Should I?

I found this tshirt on www.thinkgeek.com. I'd love to get it. But I really don't want to have to explain to the uninitiated what it means.

Da Peeples is Searching For Me

I track the traffic on my blog. When someone posts as "Anonymous," I check out the time they commented and then see if I can tell who it was by their ISP. (This works especially well when instead of getting an ISP, I get a specific IP address, oh like the one at a certain place of business where two of my readers work.)

Anyway, I noticed that people have been hitting my site as a result of web searches they've done. It's always fun to see what combination of terms makes people land on my blog. The most interesting one in recent history is ... actually there are two: "lance crackers adam corolla" and "single jew josh bernstein." Somebody out there thinks like me. Run and hide.

Room for Rent

Welp, Roomie may be moving out in 15 days. Then again, maybe not. I don't ever know with him. He tells me one thing, changes his mind 5 hours later and then 5 hours after that does something that he hasn't mentioned at all.

For example:

A few weeks ago I asked him if he was staying in town for Memorial Day Weekend. I was thinking of asking T to come up to spend the weekend with me. Since she can only do so when he is gone, I have to keep an eye out for those times when he's going to be out of town. He replied that he was going to stay in town. No big deal, he does live here.

Instead of making plans with T, I made plans for Mama to spend Friday night with me. She can stay here even when he's home. Thursday evening, Roomie popped his head into my room to tell me that he had decided to go to Savannah. So I could call T if I wanted to. Uh, thanks. I'm sure calling her at 8:30 the night before is not too late... Surely none of my lame friends have made plans for the weekend. She must just be sitting around waiting for someone to call.

Anyway, I was quite surprised to come home Friday and find chicken thawing in the sink. It made NO sense for him to come home to make dinner before getting on the road to Savannah. I called him to ask why he'd left raw chicken in the sink. (I don't think he's above trying to give me Salmonella.) He told me that he'd decided not to go to Savannah. He would be home to cook the chicken. OK. No big deal.

He was already gone from the house by the time I got up on Saturday. He didn't come home until Monday afternoon. I had no idea where he was. I laughed it off and just said, "So you ARE still alive," when I saw him Monday afternoon. He said, "Yeah, I went to Florida."

So after changing his mind twice about going to Savannah, he just up and went to Florida. There's no keeping tabs on that boy.

Anyway, now he says that he's put a contract on a condo. If the contract goes through, the closing will be in 15 days. While a part of me is glad he's moving out because we are fundamentally such different people, another part doesn't know whether or not to believe it. I don't trust a word that comes out of his mouth.

I didn't think I wanted a roommate, but I do like having the money it provides. I think I'd like to have another roommate...if she's an honest-to-goodness adult. Any single no-pet females out there who don't think it's cruel and unusual punishment for me to ask that she pull her share of cleaning the main level once a week? Submit names before talking to any available candidates. Ain't no way I'm getting stuck with a chatty roommate. I'd clean up after current Roomie for years before putting up with someone who wants to talk at me 24/7.

Keep Your Kiddies Out of Amsterdam

I know Amsterdam is a liberal city, but this is just taking it way too far. ...and they have such lovely tulips.

Ingles doesn't carry this...

My new favorite ice cream.

My History with the World (or how Karl Wallinger rocks my world)

Warning. Another long post to follow. Get over it. I can't help myself.

In fall of 1990 I moved from smallish town South to Big City New South to go to college. Beyond making lots of new friends and getting closer to ones I'd been separated from (that'd be you, R-Belle), I also discovered college radio. There were lots of bands with songs out that I liked at the time: Throwing Muses, Modern English was experiencing a revival of sorts, yadda yadda yadda. I loved all this music that no one back home had ever heard of. It was so ... liberating.

One day, I was looking through used cassette tapes on campus. I bought two because those were the only ones featuring songs I'd heard before - either on college radio or on MTV. The band I recognized from MTV was World Party, the tape I bought was called "Goodbye Jumbo." I popped the tape in my car stereo and was blown away. It became my favorite tape, replacing the likes of The Steve Miller Band, The Eagles, Boston and REM. I was addicted. But I didn't really know anyone else who liked them (maybe Reni did, but if so, she was the only one).

I wore that tape out, didn't hear much from the band in the following years and moved on to other music. (Somehow missing the awesomeness that was Jeff Buckley in 1994/95.) But that one album (yes, I'm calling it an album) stuck with me. Anytime I was in a used CD store, I'd look for CDs from World Party. I finally found one called "History of the World." It renewed my addiction all over again. Not long after I found that CD, I heard that World Party was touring again (1997).

By that time, I had gotten T hooked on the "Goodbye Jumbo" tape (I think I was still listening to it on tape in 1997). Somehow, I talked young T into accompanying me to the concert. World Party was touring to support their latest release "Egyptology." I can't remember if I bought the CD before going to the show or after. The band played a lunch concert on the local rock radio station the day of their concert. I taped it from my office cubicle.

I got terrible reception in the office. But that didn't keep me from dragging in my whole stereo (with only one speaker) and putting it under my desk. I climbed under my desk to tape the show. I couldn't really listen to it because I didn't want to turn it up. But I kept trying to check to make sure I was getting good reception. It's really funny to think about that now.

Anyway, T and I went to the show and it was ... A W E S O M E. Until this weekend, it sat uncontested in the number 1 spot of my concert-going experiences (and I've been to some really good shows). We were there early enough to get a great spot right up front. I had my elbows on the stage right under Karl Wallinger for the whole concert. He even kinda talked to me during the show. In the very beginning, the people on the front row couldn't hear his mic. Me and the guy beside me got his attention. He bent down to listen to us. He couldn't understand the guy beside me, but he understood that I was telling him we couldn't hear him. He told the guy on the sound board to correct the problem and then looked back at me to see if it was better. I signalled that it was. Hooty hooty. (I know I've told that story before, but I love telling it.)

Sometime around that concert, I bought "Goodbye Jumbo" on CD and turned over my cassette version to T. She later used it to hook in another fan. I still have the tape of the radio concert and would love to get help putting it on CD. Karl did a great cover of a Paul McCartney song that is better than Paul's own version.

Sometime after 2000, I found another CD that was only available as an import. By that time, I didn't care what it cost, I was buying whatever World Party put out. I was looking for an extension of "Goodbye Jumbo" and this wasn't it. It had a few great songs, but it didn't bowl me over. Then...

N O T H I N G.

It was like World Party dropped off the face of the earth. I knew a couple of UK artists had covered some of his songs, but nothing was coming directly from him. (And yes, World Party really is just Karl Wallinger hiding behind a band's name.) I continued to check for new stuff, but there wasn't anything to be had. I think the lowest point in my fandom came when I wanted to give The Polyglot a copy of "Goodbye Jumbo" as part of his graduation gift last fall. Despite the fact that this is a highly critically acclaimed album and is the most important album in the World Party catalog, it was nowhere to be found. I thought I could just walk into any place that sold music to pick one up. Nope. The most depressing thing is that when I went all the way to the big record store in the middle of town and asked if they had it in stock, the dude didn't even recognize the band's name. He was like, "Which was the band name and which was the name of the CD?" You've got. To be. Kidding me.

ALL THAT HAS CHANGED.

I got email from TicketMaster (thank you thank you thank you) about two months ago that World Party would be playing a show in town. I hopped online and bought the first four tickets. Yes, the FIRST four. I couldn't believe World Party was coming to town! Wow. That meant new music! World Party only tours to support a new release.

I was a little confused to find out that Karl was finally releasing that 2000 UK cd in the States. Huh. What was that about? Who cares. I was getting to see him again. (You all knew that part.)

Due to one thing or another, T was the only friend I could get to go with me. (That's just the facts, I'm not spreading any blame or guilt.) T got a friend of hers to come along, so there were three of us. Guess who was late? Not me. I was about the 8th person in line. While standing in line, the guy behind me said he'd read in the paper that Karl had had some health problems. Huh. I hadn't heard about that.

That news was soon forgotten because when Karl came out and played...it was magic once more. He didn't have a full band. There were only three of them - Karl on rhythm guitar and baby grand, David Duffy on fiddle and mandolin, and John Turnbull on lead guitar. No bass. No drums. Uh, have I ever confessed how much I love bass and drums? I was more than a little nervous when I realized that there was no bass or drums. What was I thinking?

I could not believe how well the fiddle filled in for the drums and bass. There were a couple of places where I wanted to hear the drums, but my mind inserted them (and my hands played them). Overall, though, it was incredible. Again, we were sitting front and center. This time at a table, like adults. I was a little disappointed with the table arrangement. It was nice to have a place to sit before the show, but once it started I wanted to get up and dance. Being right in the front, I would have ticked off a lot of people if I had.

Anyway, I wasn't able to hang out and meet Karl after the last concert. But nothing was going to stop me from doing so this time. (So maybe it's good that y'all didn't come with me.) After the suckers who didn't know any better left the building, the band came out to sign autographs and glad hand their fans. I was pretty early in the line to talk to Karl.

I've listened to this man's music for 15 years. I had to tell him thanks and tell him what a good job he'd done. I also asked for him to come back soon. He agreed that it would not be another 7 years (it was actually 9) - he'd be back sooner next time. In fact, he said he's planning to return "later in the summer" with the full band. It was cute listening to him talk about how this is such a scaled down tour. He basically doesn't have any roadies, it's just the three of them and his manager. (Maybe the one roadie I saw actually belonged to the venue.)

I got him to sign the DVD that came with the newish cd I bought at the show. (I also bought a tshirt, but didn't want him to sign that 'cause I want to wear it.) The funny thing is that T's friend - who had never even heard of World Party before the show - was so impressed by his music that she got in line to buy a CD. Since T and I had to wait on her, we just stood back and watched the band interact with their adoring fans. It was fun. I felt a little bad for the other two guys. I didn't realize it at the time, but John Turnbull also played with him at the last show I went to. I guess John is kinda an official member of the band. (But Sinead O'Conner sang back up and was in one of his videos in 1986. So people come and go all the time.) I didn't know either of the other guys so I didn't get them to sign anything. (Despite the fiddle player being an absolutely adorable guy who not only looks Irish but actually is Irish.) T's friend was so funny. She only got the cute fiddle player's autograph. That's crazy.

After a while we actually had to leave the building - there was no reasonable excuse for standing there and staring at the band any longer. The three of us went out to the parking lot and chatted for 15 - 20 minutes, maybe longer. They finally got in T's friend's truck and popped in "Goodbye Jumbo." I got in my car and guess what CD was already in my player? The 2000 release of "Dumbing Up." (You thought I was gonna say "Goodbye Jumbo," didn't you?) I put it on my favorite song, a really poppy/funky sure-fire hit called "Here Comes the Future." I put down my windows, opened my sunroof and turned up the volume.

Heading out of the parking lot, I had to drive by the tour bus. I recognized the guy getting into it as the guy who'd sold me the tshirt and CD. He looked up and waved. I waved back. I looked to the right. Standing just outside the building was Karl Wallinger. He heard his music pumping from someone's car, so he looked up. Karl got a big smile on his face and pointed at me. Naturally, I pointed back.

How often does that happen? When is the last time you were blaring REM or Sting or Bing Crosby and looked up to see that the dude singing on your radio was smiling and pointing at you? It just doesn't happen. As much as I think this word is overused, the only word to describe the experience is surreal.

If you think you're not going to the next show... think again. But be prepared to be there early - Horse N. Buggy waits for no one when it comes to taking her place in the front row at World Party.

See official photos of the show here. By the way, T and I talked to the photographer. (I couldn't help myself.) It turns out that Karl had a BRAIN ANEURISM after he released "Dumbing Up" in 2000/2001. The man couldn't TALK for a couple of years. Yeah, I'd call that a health problem. I was even more blown away after hearing that. I couldn't tell he'd had anything wrong with his brain during the show. He knew all the lyrics and played all the songs fabulously.

Here Comes the Future...

It's bigger than the TV!

I love Walgreen's. You can buy just about anything there. I stop by there at least weekly, if not more often. Last week, we learned how men with muscly butts are more important than women with breast cancer. Last night I learned that not all products are trying to get smaller.

While many now sport cellphones smaller than a bobby pin, Walgreen's is selling a remote control that is larger than your TV. I imagine that this is for the macrodegeneral generation (da old folks), but I question whether they are able to lift it. At some point readability gets in the way of heftability. Next thing you know, they'll make TV remotes larger than a laptop. Oh wait, this thing already is larger than the new Ultra Mobile PC, which is a fully functioning PC.

I put my hand in the shot to prove how large it is and to show that I'm not doing any trick photography.

Chatting Up My Second Favorite Jew

Remember that hella long post I wrote about podcasting? Didn't read it all? Shame on you. That means you missed out on one of the best parts at the end. I introduced you to my newly recognized obsession with Jewish men. Two of my top three podcasts are from Jewish guys who view the world with a very familiar wit. Well, I spoke with one of those guys on Saturday morning - Michael Feldman.

Since you didn't read the previous post, I'll catch you up. Michael has a 2 hour radio show on NPR. It features interviews and quizzes with audience members. The quizzes always involve one person from the studio audience and one listener who calls in. I've loved this show for years, but can rarely listen to it. It plays on Saturdays from 11 - 1 on the south side of town. Now that I'm on the north side, I can't tune in at all. I went looking for the podcast version, couldn't find it, wrote in to the show, got an almost instant email back from a PA that the podcast can be purchased on a subscription basis, handed over my money and can now listen whenever I feel like it.

At the same time that I sent in the email asking about the podcast, I signed up to be a "caller" for the quiz. Michael "asks" for people to call in, but he really has prearranged people standing by waiting to answer the question. The caller is asked a qualifying question (that is always more difficult than the actual quiz questions). If the caller answers the question correctly, they can play along with the audience member. Both players work as a team and get equal prizes for their efforts.

I was the first caller waiting on line. The qualifying question was: What new regulation has the SEC instituted and called the Katie Couric Clause? I had no idea. The Doctor was standing right next to me, so I repeated the question back to Michael so she could hear it. She was similarly clueless. I gave a bogus answer that basically made no sense. Whatever. I still got to talk to Michael Feldman and be on "Whad'ya Know?"

I just downloaded and listened to the podcast. I am very happy to report that I don't sound nervous or Southern. I made a concerted effort to drop my accent in high school. I was never quite sure if I was successful. I now think I've done quite well with that. I totally sounded like I was from California. Rawk on. This gives me hope for any future endeavors I may have with creating my own podcasts. I just may have a voice for podcasting after all. (I'm just surprised at how different my voice sounded than it usually does on a video tape. I HATE the way I sound on video!)

What Happened to John and Jane?

The movie we watched sounded like it was going to be more of a comedy than it turned out to be. But I guess I just didn't read the synopsis very well. "John and Jane" (two characters not actually featured in the film) is about 6 young Indians living in Mumbai and working in American call centers. They work the night shift in order to call Americans when we are home. These are the people who call us to sell us new long distance services, medical emergency systems, etc, etc, etc. Each of the six people had a unique way of dealing with and adjusting to their "Indian thinking like an American but still living in India" lives.

First, we met Glen. Over and over and over and over and over again. Glen is a bitter, foul-mouthed Indian who deeply resents how this call center job is keeping him from modeling for Gucci. Glens real call to greatness seems to be sleeping late and being a nuissance to his mother. By the way, Glen was the only person featured whose mother is still alive (if you don't count a multi-national pyramid selling organization as a mother, but we'll get to that later). Glen loved to use filthy filthy language to describe the people he talks to on the phone in America. I think Glen has seen far too many episodes of "The Sopranos" during his American cultural classes. We don't all talk like that.

Then we met Sidney. Sidney sells "medical emergency systems" to unsuspecting Americans. Excuse me, he sends them absolutely FREE medical emergency systems and the brochures to go with it. When the callers on the other line ask for a definition of a "medical emergency system," Sidney enlightens them with the stunning details that it's a "kit." Oh, that makes it all so much clearer. Thanks Sid. Sidney really sucks at this job. But what does he care? Sidney's passion is for dancin'. In fact, I think you could call him a "Dancin' Machine" or the "Dancin' Queen" - either one fits. You know, I was wrong. Sidney also has a living mother who tries to feed him his favorite food. He swears she's crazy and this is not his favorite food. Perhaps he doesn't think he can keep his waifish figure if he gives in to temptation. There is an absolutely priceless scene featuring Sidney breakin' it down with some dancin' studio pals. I don't think it was meant to be funny, so I kept my lauging to myself. I was crying.

Next up was Nikki who is so not a Valerie. Nikki has found Jesus in the local holy-roller church which features a lot of young foreign women swaying and holdng hands while dressed in saris. Nikki never knew her parents. The aunt who raised her recently died and left her their "lodge." Nikki no longer runs it as a lodge. She lets people who need places to stay live there, presumably for some amount of rent, though that wasn't specifically discussed. Nikki thinks of the people at the call center as her family. She is really good with her customers. She sells long distance service to old people in Texas who don't make long distance phone calls. But that doesn't stop her from assuring them that her plan will save them money. She is one of the best on her team, which means she suckers more people into buying her than anyone else does. But since she loves her customers, it's OK.

Next, we were treated to a pleasant rendition of "Love Me Tender" by the Indian version of not-Elvis. I don't remember this guy's name, but I'll call him Rich Patel. He wants to be a billionaire by October of this year. Considering that's only 5 months away, I thought he needed to "hop to." I think the film was made in 2002, so he had a little more breathing room to amass his fortune. And this guy had a plan. He had dismissed all of his friends so that he could focus on work. He listens to "you can be rich, think wealthy thoughts, dream of wealth, you are worthy" type cassettes while he sleeps. His home is overflowing with business strategy books from the likes of Zig Zigglar. To start him down the path of success, he joined the organization with the largest number of millionaires - AmWay. Excuse me, that's Mother AmWay. Yes, that's right, Rich thinks of AmWay as his mother. She loves him, helps him achieve his goals and provides for him. T used to work for the daughter of the people who founded AmWay. I wonder if she knows that she has a brother in Mumbai. T and I should arrange a family reunion.

Fifth up on the list was someone who actually found family in the call center. This guy married one of his coworkers - a woman who didn't even know he was interested in her when he proposed. Things were going great until she got a job in a different call center. Now they work different shifts and have to meet for brief trysts at McDonalds. He showers her with romantic gifts of Hamburglar toys. She looks bored and refuses to engage in conversation. Uh, maybe they should have dated before they got married. This guy hates his life. He hates India. He wants to be American.

Like the brilliant film-maker he dreams of being, the director saved the most unique character for last. Indira Blondie is a "totally natural blonde" to whom dark roots and brown eyes mean nothing. She loves her unique look and all the male attention it brings her. She likes to go clubbing and wear make up just like American girls. She refuses to drop her bizarre faux American accent when she leaves the call center - it's probably "totally natural" too. There is a great scene of her getting a facial. The lovely and well-made up young lady performing the facial has actually done a nice job selecting colors for Blondie. She tries to stress the need for foundation without embarrassing Blondie. Yes, honey, she's referring to the weird redness you've got on your cheeks - perhaps a side effect from skin bleaching? When the facialist tries to put mascara on Blondie's lashes, she wigs out because she "doesn't wear black mascara on her blonde lashes." She pays good money for that bleach, she's not going to cover it up with mascara. The thing is, beauty experts routinely tell blondes that if they only have time to apply one piece of makeup, chose mascara. Blondes look like walking death without it. But I guess Indira Blondie is into the post-mortem look.

There was a couple in front of us who left in the middle of the movie. The husband looked at his wife and said, "I'm ready any time you are." They basically bolted after that. A part of me wanted to join them, but I'm glad I stuck it out. It was blogworthy.

Oh - "John" and "Jane" are the fictional representations of Americans that these Indian companies use to indoctrinate their employees about the American way of life.

Weird Appetizer and a Movie

First, I would like to say that none of the following should be taken as a criticism of dear reader Julie. She got this evening together. The companionship was lovely. But some experiences are just so much more intesting for their blogworthiness.

Good Soup and a Movie was put on hiatus for a night at the High watching a foreign film. I need to say that I love doing stuff like this. I love the city of Atlanta, but don't spend nearly enough time in it. I want to spend more evenings doing high falutin' stuff.

So, The Polyglot and I met Julie and Affable Olive at the High's restaurant - Table 1280. Traffic was a little worse than I expected it to be and I got a tad turned around because I'm not used to coming into the city from the north. We were much later than we should have been to meet them. Oh well. It all worked out.

Table 1280 is a neat place. The overall feel is very consistent with the decor of the museum. One whole wall of the smallish dining room features an "art" piece of ginormous mixing bowls attached to the wall (with the convex side sticking out towards you). The tables, floor and chairs are blonde wood. It looks very ... sterile.

The menu is full of items that sound vaguely familiar, but I have no idea how they are prepared. For example, Berkshire Pork means that the pork is sliced. OK. They had to named sliced pork after a city in England? Are the inhabitants of Berkshire porcine genuises? Were they the first people to slice pork before serving it? Wow. That's a culinary revolution. Anyway, the Berkshire Pork was good, the almost not viscous pototoes were tasty (but seriously how can you make potatoes taste bad?), the rhubarb was pretty and the onions smelled nice.

But it was the appetizer that sticks in my craw, if not in my belly. I wanted a salad, but was leary of the vinaigrette dressing because I wasn't in the mood for a sweet dressing. After I asked about a salad and hesitated about the waiter's answer, the waiter then asked if I liked Mozarella cheese. Duh, who doesn't? He pointed to the last appetizer, I noticed the $14 price tag, but ordered it anyway. ($14 is more than I pay for a whole dinner at the thai place!)

The waiter set my appetizer down in front of me. I thought my meal had come with a little piece of art to take home as a memento. It sure didn't look like a salad - it barely looked like food. It was basically a piece of bread with a couple of hunks of tomatoes, some spices, an enormous poof of something they tried to pass off as mozarella cheese, a couple of sprigs of grass freshly picked from outside (I swear I saw dirt hanging from the end of one of those stalks) and some pale colored stuff (perhaps dead grass they've been preserving in the kitchen - a nice Winter '04 harvest). The whole concoction was circled by little dots of ruby lipstick. That particular shade of lipstick wouldn't go with our waiter's complexion, so he must have borrowed it from one of the other waiters, perhaps the sweet thang who sat us. To top it all off, the whole thing tasted like raspberry vinaigrette dressing.

During dinner, the other three looked out the window (to the main piazza of the High Museum) and saw a dude walk by in an interesting outfit. Their reactions were so immediate, that I had to turn around for a gander. I saw half a second of a man in a sear-sucker sport coat and very loud electric green shoes. That was enough time to realize that I know this man. He's a coworker. Nothing he wears will ever shock me. He wore those shoes to the office on St. Patrick's Day - with other articles of green clothing that did not match (but then again, I don't think anything matches those shoes).

I'm going to stop here and let you digest all of this. The movie deserves it's own blog entry.

Best. Day. Evah.

Saturday, May 20th is seriously in the running for my Best Day Ever.

I began the day on the phone with Michael Feldman. I ended the day chatting with Karl Wallinger. Does it get any better than that?

Details later - when I can do them justice.

Should I support dying women or men with muscly buttocks?

I was at Walgreen's yesterday morning when I noticed something that slightly horrified me. In the last-minute-oh-crap-I-really-need-that-bald-eagle-shaped-razor-aisle just before the cash register, I saw those little plastic/rubber "cause" bracelets that have become so popular. What astounded me was that right next to the pink-fight-breast-cancer bracelets was a red bracelet simply titled "Falcons" and bearing the team logo of the NFL's Atlanta Falcons.

I was in too much of a hurry to pick up the package, but I snapped a pic for you. From my unusually clear camera phone photo, you can see that there is no "cause" marketed on the packaging. It looks like this is simply a way for fans to declare their undying love for men who make way too much money and have very disturbingly overdeveloped buttocks.

How? How can Walgreen's seriously, in good conscience, display these bracelets next to Breast Cancer bracelets? And who could reach past the bracelets that fund research to fight the number one killer of women (your mama being a woman) to buy a stoopid bracelet for a sports team? (Yeah, yeah, I know breast cancer is not the leading cause of death in women...I'm making a point, here.)

If you notice, there are far fewer Falcons bracelets than breast cancer bracelets. I don't know if that means the Falcons bracelets sold like bagels or if Walgreen's didn't stock as many. Regardless, I better not catch any of you wearing a Falcon's bracelet into my home.

American Idol - It's Almost D-Day

I'm sitting here watching my VHS copy of American Idol from Tuesday night. I'm trying to see the performances before I find out later on tonight who is kicked off. Going into the show, I was convinced that Kat would be kicked off tonight, but so far it looks like the judges are trying to swing it so that she makes it to the finals.

So here's how this performance show works. There are three contestants left which means that there's enough time for them to sing three songs a piece. The first round of songs are chosen by Super Famous Music Mogul Ex-Husband of Mariah Carey, Clive Davis. The second round of songs are chosen by the judges (more accurately one judge gets to choose a song for one contestant - three judges, three contestants, it works out). The final round of songs are chosen by the conestants themselves.

Elliott Yamin (my boy):
Music Mogul Clive Davis' song - "Open Arms" by Journey. WHAT?!?! I doubt Elliott has ever listened to Journey much less ever desired to sing one of their songs. To top it off, Judge Randy Jackson used to be IN Journey. It was a little unexciting. How do you match Steve Perry's earnestness? You don't even try. The judges were not wild about it, although Randy admitted that he did a decent job. Simon told him that he needed to sing like he believed he could make it to the finals and loosen up.
Paula Abdul's song - "What You Won't Do For Love" by several jazz bands, most recently by Go West. I literally screamed when they announced he would be singing this. This is one of my all-time favorite songs, evah. Elliott almost brought tears to my eyes singing this song. I sincerely hope that he releases this song after the show. In fact, I may have to search the internet to download an illegal copy of his performance of it. Seriously. This is when I wish I had a newer tv recording device. Randy claimed that Elliott was sharp for the whole song. Whatever. Clean the wax out of your ears - dawg. Of course, Paula was giddy. I'm surprised she didn't wet herself. Simon admitted that the style of the song was perfect for him. Woohoo, big praise indeed.
Elliott's song - I have no idea what it was but he sang it really well. I started typing this entry while he was singing it, so I wasn't paying too much attention. I would have stopped in my tracks if it had been a recognizable song. Basically the judges busted him for that very thing - song choice. Simon as good as told him that he was leaving this week. And I have to keep reminding myself that I'm OK with that. The competitor inside me wants my boy to win so badly that I can't focus on the future.

Katharine McPhee:
Music Mogul Clive Davis' song - "I Believe I Can Fly" by some dude I hate, oh yeah, R. Kelly. I guess she sang it fairly well. I just hate this song so much it's hard to listen to anyone sing it. The judges thought it was a bad choice, which is funny considering that Music Mogul Clive Davis selected it.
Simon Cowell's song - "Somewhere Over the Rainbow" by Judy Garland. Kat sat on the stage and didn't move for this entire song. She sounded really good, but I didn't like it quite as much as the judges did. Randy loved it. Paula said it was her best performance of the whole season. Simon said it was the best performance by anyone all season. Hmmm, got a little crush on Kat do we, Simon?
Kat's song - I don't know, something really jazzy by Ella Fitgerald. The thing is, I love for Kat to sing these old jazzy numbers. I think these suit her voice best. Again, I wasn't paying much attention, but I think the judges basically liked it. But to prove that they were trying to push her through to next week, they talked about how fabulous her previous performance was.

Taylor Hicks:
Music Mogul Clive Davis' song - "Dancing in the Dark" by Bruce Springsteen. Evidently this was the first time AI featured one of the Boss' songs. It took Clive Davis and Taylor Hicks to make it happen. Whoop de do. I hate the Boss, so I wasn't too impressed with this song either. Taylor sang it well, but I just don't like the song. The judges thought he did fine. I don't really remember their reaction.
Randy Jackson's song - "You Are So Beautiful" by Joe Cocker. Everyone's been talking about Taylor's Joe Cocker moves all season, so let's just give him a Joe Cocker song. The thing is, he did it really well. The dude CAN sing and he is a better dancer than Joe Cocker. He even danced with Paula, proving that he has lots more stage presence than the other two contestants. Yep, Taylor is way more relaxed on stage than the others. He's got something you can't teach (except through experience). The judges loved his voice.
Taylor's song - "Try a Little Tenderness" by Otis Redding. (The first Google link says Bing recorded it in 1933! I don't think it was the same song, though.) Of course, this song was practically made for Taylor so he nails it. The judges go crazy nuts and Simon stops pretending that he's not pulling for Taylor by saying, "See you next week." (Simon thinks he'll convince the audience to vote Elliott off this week and then he'll finagle Kat's victory next week.)

I was not surprised to find out that I hated every one of Music Mogul Clive Davis' song choices. That explains why I hate "hit" songs these days.

Only 20 more minutes before someone gets kicked off. I'll keep you updated.

Update: It turns out that Music Mogul Clive Davis has been behind all the albums released by the American Idol machine. I used to wonder why I loved these people on the show, but hated their real music. Now I finally understand. Go away and stop screwing up my music, Music Mogul Clive Davis!

On Wednesday's show, they reviewed the trips each contestant made to their home towns. Each of them got to meet their state's governor, except Kat whose Govenator decided she wasn't worth his time. "Hasta la vista" indeed.

Here's the voting break down:
33.68% ?
33.26% ?
33.06% - my boy's going home.

They usher my boy Elliott out with a montage of him talking about his experience at Idol. He's crying in almost every interview. Have I mentioned how much I love this guy? I know I've said it before and not come through, but I'm lining up for this guy's first album. I mean it this time. He's way better than Clay Aiken and I was a HUGE Clay fan. Goodbye, Elliott. See ya soon.

To Settle a Dispute

This posting is for The Polyglot who couldn't find his way out of a paper bag (unless the directions were written in Urdu). You may have to click it to get the full effect.

Anonymous Needs a Name

I usually give people nicknames based on things that have happened or conversations I've had with them. I don't have a wealth of those things to draw on with you. So, we could also do some variation of your name or what it sounds like.

Hmmm. Anonymous' name doesn't rhyme with anything. Anonymous' name means "soft and gentle." Um, I'm thinking no on that, unless we called her "Fluffy" just to annoy her. :-)

Yep, that's it, Fluffy Olive. Or Affable Olive. Yeah, I think I like Affable Olive better. And with this, I'd like to welcome Affable Olive as a reader to my blog!

By the way, Affable Olive's aunt's name means "soft-haired, youthful." Soft-haired? How can a name mean that? But then again, my mother's name means "strange one or stranger." But it's OK to talk to her.

A Problematic Friend

I have a problem with one of new friends. Instead of taking my problem to her, I'm going to air it right here on my blog and let my dear readers tell me how to solve it. Ready? Let's dish the dirt.

How do you pronounce the name Yvonne? (Isn't that a juicy problem?)

When I see that name, my honest reaction in my head is to say WhyVonne - like "Why Von? Why would you have a name I can't pronounce?" But I know that's not right.

So my next choice is YeVon - like the "ye" in "yellow." "Yes YeVon, yellow is your color." But I'm not certain that is correct either.

Then I will try E!Von - like the "e" in "E! Entertainment Television." "E!Von doesn't read her email each day so I often think she is evading me." But is that right? Maybe.

My final option is EhVon - like the "eh" sound in "every". "Everyone like EhVon because she's eh-dorable."

Dear readers, help me solve my dilema. If you can't, I'm just going to give up and call her Mandy Moore.

Don't be grossed out

The house ain't gonna be spotless tonight. I will clean up a little bit when I get home, but I have a headache and won't stress out over it. On top of Roomie's normal cooking mess, there is mess left over from last weekend that I haven't gotten around to yet. I did at least load the dishwasher this morning, so I will unload it. I guess I'll really only have to wipe the counters and sweep the floor. That won't take too long. I just won't get to the living room.

So if you sit on the floor in the living room tonight, wear black pants (with no buttons or metal thingies) and wiggle around. That would help me clean my living room floor.

I bought a new tablecloth so that I can hopefully always keep a clean one on the table. But I'm not going to iron the new one...deal with it.

Bye Bye Baldie

Yes, they voted off the hot guy last night: Chris. I'm slightly impressed that the two not cute guys were the top vote-getters: Taylor and Elliott. Could America be wisening up? Are they learning to like people for their talent and not just their looks. If American Idol can bring about THAT change, I say ... More. Power. To. Them.

I am so tired of people getting popular because they look good. If that had always been the requirement, the world would not have known: James Taylor, Karen Carpenter (although she wasn't too bad), Barry Manilow, Lionel Richie, Jim Croce, Joe Cocker (the phrase "Dear God what is that thing?" comes to mind), Ringo Star (wait, maybe I'm OK with that), any of The Rolling Stones, Jimi Hendrix and maybe even my very own Bing Crosby (certainly his idol - Al Jolson - so is Al Jolson my grandidol?).

Regardless, I'm sticking with my decision that Taylor should win (for totally selfish reasons). Chris will be more than OK. He's built a very loyal fanbase who will buy whatever he releases. In the paraphrased words of Tommy Motola, 'Chris has an incredible recording voice.'

A Bundle O Nerves

I can't believe American Idol is down to four finalists and I like every single one of them. Usually by this time I have a clear favorite. That is not the case this season. I didn't care too that the little girl from Fayetteville was booted last week. She will make it on her own. Anyway, here are my feelings on the remaining contestants:

Kathrine McPhee - Lovely voice and lovely girl. Like Kelly Clarkson, I think she can sing just about anything. Is the similarity enough to make her a winner? Maybe. She would certainly blend well with their song writing abilities.

Elliot Yamin - Actually, he is probably my favorite. When he hits it, man, he knocks it out of the park. Last week he sang "Home" better than Michael Buble (it was playing in my head for days). However, as much as I love him, I'm not sure I want him to win. I don't think "they" could write the kind of songs that I want to hear him sing. He needs the freedom to be the next James Taylor, but I don't know if they'll give it to him.

Chris Daughtry - Yum. Rocking voice, bald head. What more could I want? I probably won't like a thing he puts out after this show is over, though. It will all be overproduced. If he could follow in the steps of Chris Cornell, I would continue to be a fan. But I'm sure he'll be more like Fuel or [insert any current rawk band name here].

Taylor Hicks - Which leaves the freak. I probably want him to win. His style is so unique that they couldn't force him into their mold. The AI people would actually have to be creative with their song writing. It's a rebel concept, but it just might work. I think we'd actually see them do funk if Taylor won. That would be cool. Go Taylor Hicks! Wow. He was my favorite at the beginning of the season. And while he's technically not my favorite any more, I'm still routing for him. Impressive. But that actually means that he'll come in second. Mark. My. Words.

Casting for pods

Warning! Hella long post to follow!

I am the editor of our department's bimonthly newsletter. We write about personal technology, not work related stuff. Over the months, we have written what I think are some interesting articles. The last issue featured a life-changing article for me. One of my coworkers wrote about podcasting.

I know that I've explained to y'all that this is the reason why I broke down and bought an mp3 player. Now that I've been listening to podcasts for almost two months, I thought I'd give you an overview of the whole podcatching process and which podcasts I've found interesting.

Podcatching:
There are two main pieces of software you can use to subscribe to podcasts. Wait. Maybe I should explain a little better what a podcast is.

Podcast:
Wikipedia defines podcasting as:

"Podcasting is the method of distributing multimedia files, such as audio programs or music videos, over the Internet for playback on mobile devices and personal computers. The distribution format of a podcast uses either the RSS or Atom syndication formats.

The term podcast, like "radio", can mean both the content and the method of delivery. The host or author of a podcast is often referred to as a "podcaster".

Podcasters' web sites may also offer direct download or streaming of their files, however a podcast is distinguished by its ability to be downloaded automatically using software capable of reading RSS or Atom feeds.

Usually the podcast features one type of "show", with new episodes either sporadically or at planned intervals, such as daily or weekly. In addition to this, there are podcast networks that feature multiple shows on the same feed.

Podcasting's essence is about creating content (audio or video) for an audience that wants to listen or watch when they want, where they want, and how they want."

So basically, a podcast is a do-it-yourself radioshow. Some of them feature music, others feature people talking. The talk shows can be broken down into game shows, educational shows, call in shows, or just people spouting their opinions.

Podcatching (redux):
So, there are two main pieces of software you can use to subscribe to podcasts. Both allow you to look through directories of podcast shows based on how popular they are to other people. Both will automatically check your subscribed to shows to see if a new episode has been published. If there is a new episode, the software will just download it without bothering you. Both allow you to listen to shows either on your PC or on an mp3 player.

1. Juice (formerly called iPodder) - This software is mp3 player agnostic, so if you don't have an iPod, you may want to choose this one. I don't know if Juice is any different from the version of iPodder that I used for a few weeks. iPodder was better than iTunes at general screen refreshing. It was also better at notifying me when there was a new episode of a podcast. iTunes will download new episodes, but it isn't always obvious which podcasts got new episodes unless I sit there and watch the whole download process (and who wants to do that?).

2. iTunes - Since buying my iPod, I've switched over to iTunes. One thing that used to make me crazy about iPodder was that I couldn't tell which files I'd already listened to. I understand that marking a file as "listened to" isn't a big deal with songs, but it is huge deal with podcasts. I typically only want to listen to a podcast once. That functionality and its easy connectivity to my iPod make iTunes the clear winner for me.

3. www.audible.com - I do want to mention one pay service. First I should say that most of the podcasts available through the other two pieces of software are FREE! I just started using this pay service to get two shows I used to listen to on public radio. I will talk about the shows later on. But for now I wanted to mention that this is a service that sits on top of your podcatcher software. (It's supposed to work natively with iTunes without the Audible Manager software, but I can't get that to work.) You can pay for audiobooks or podcasts per file. Or you can sign up for a yearly subscription to get discounts on those same files. Either way, their audiobooks are still much cheaper than books on CD that you buy from B&N (which I used to do).

My Shows:
I should explain that I drive quite a long way to work. I have about a 90 minute round trip commute. I listen to most of these shows in the car or while cleaning the house. So while it may look like I listen to a lot of shows, I have the time to do so. I'm going to list them in order of how excited I get when a new one appears on my PC. I'm not going to list the shows that I've already unsubscribed from, lots of shows got only one listen. I'm linking either to the show or the actual RSS feed for the show.

1. The History Channel's Digging for the Truth - (updated rarely, but usually two or three shows at a time) The audio journal of host Josh Bernstein. This podcast is a companion to the actual TV show played on the History Channel. After each episode of the TV show, Josh records 6 - 14 minutes worth of behind the scenes info. This is the only podcast that I do not delete the files after I've listened to them. I actually give a little shout if I see that there is a new episode waiting on my PC. I love this television show. Somehow this Jewish survival expert and I see the world through very similar eyes. Everything he says is just riveting (or maybe it's his eyes that are riveting - naw, I can't see those in the podcast).

2. CNET.com's Buzz Out Loud - (updated daily) Admittedly, this is one that may appeal more to me than to any of you. This podcast of "indeterminate length" (usually between 25 - 35 minutes) is how I stay tuned in to what is going on in the world of technology. But this show also happens to be fairly entertaining. The show features Tom Merritt, Veronica Belmont and Molly Wood (who calls in at the crack of dawn every Tuesday on our very own Dave FM). These people basically have my dream job. They get to play with new technology and broadcast their opinions on a radio show style podcast. They even get paid to blog. The down side? They live in IMMORAL SAN FRANCISCO! Shocking.

3. Brini Maxwell's Hints for Gracious Living - (updated whenever she feels like it, weekly, monthly, whatever) This is soooo not me, but I adore this podcast. Usually lasting no more than 6 minutes, this podcast is a throw back to the glamour of the 60s. Brini Maxwell uses her almost disturbingly effervescent voice to help people rediscover a bygone era. (This show is totally Julie and her sister.) I giggle through the whole thing because I just can't believe she's for real. I recently found out that Brini had a show on the Style Network which is "on hiatus." There is a DVD of the first season that I am considering buying for the sheer kitch of it all.

4. A Spoonful of Russian - (updated when the weather permits) Natalia is a former Ukranian teacher, now a mother of two living in the States, who is putting her teaching skills to good use in a podcast. She uses her 9 year old daughter in the lesson conversations to prove that adults can't speak Russian as well as her children. Of all the podcasts I listen to, this one has the best supplemental website. Natalia puts a lot of energy into making the show notes appealing, even using photographs of items she talks about. It's all this quality that makes the show less frequent. Natalia and her family live in New Orleans and were hit by Katrina right after she began her podcast. They are recovering, but rebuilding takes precedence over the show. One of the things I don't care for as much is that she always includes a Russian song at the end of the lesson. So far all the songs have been from the 50s and are very "Russian." (In other words, BORING.) The song also pushes a normally 6 - 10 minute show into an almost 18 minute show (but not if you fast forward through it).

5. NPR: Wait Wait ... Don't Tell Me - (updated every Monday) NPR is the first place I looked when I began podcatching. I love public radio, but as I said earlier, I only listen to audio in my car. There are some great NPR shows that come on when I'm not in my car. "Wait Wait" is one of those (though not my most favoritist). I was really looking for "Michael Feldman's Whad'Ya Know," but couldn't find it. Then I looked for "Says You," but couldn't find that either. I think I even looked for "Car Talk," but couldn't find that. I settled for this show and it is pretty good. This is a panel/game show featuring a small variety of really funny panelists, like Mo Rocca and Paula Poundstone (who is still hi-larious despite having been "nowhere" for the last few years). In fact, if these panelists weren't so funny, I probably wouldn't spend 47 minutes listening to this show every week. The show turns the week's headlines into witty games. And sometimes, if it weren't for this show, I wouldn't know what was going on in the world. So if I have to listen to the news, I may as well be entertained by it.

6. A Way With Words - (updated - I don't know - should be weekly) Martha Barnette and Richard Lederer talk to the San Diego (I think) area about English and all the great words in it.
This 50 minute show is very witty. They also get to the heart of word issues that have been plaguing people for years. Why do people in Wisconsin say "come with" when they really me "come with me?" Richard and Martha can tell you why.

7. NPR Shows - (updated weekly) NPR has a variety of shows where they pull together stories on related topics from the previous week. I subscribe to "Technology" and "Pop Culture". They also have shows where they highlight one or two really interesting stories from the week: "Driveway Moments" features a story that was so good people couldn't get out of their car until it was over. "Station Showcase" features a really interesting story produced by a local public radio station (as opposed to the national station). I also subscribe to their "Sunday Puzzle" podcast which is just the 7 - 8 minutes from "Weekend Edition" featuring puzzlemaster Will Shorts and his caller. Naturally, "really interesting" is a matter of personal opinion, so I don't always listen to these shows. But I subscribe so that I at least have the choice. Sometimes I fast forward through uninteresting segments of "Technology" or "Pop Culture." You can find all of these shows at www.npr.org, search for podcast.

8. It's Those Foreigners - (updated randomly) Jim Curtiss is an American living and writing abroad. His 5 - 12 minute podcast is about various experiences he's had dealing with cultural differences in foreign lands. Sometimes I feel that Jim doesn't push himself to be as witty as he could be, but sometimes he nails it. I've only been listening to it for about a week. I especially liked his story about "The Mad Russian" playing baseball in Prague. On his website you'll find a link to his podcast and examples of his writings.

9. The Real Deal from CNET - (too new to have an update schedule) Tom Merritt from cnet's Buzz Out Loud has his own podcast. I don't know if there is a consistent theme to his show, but so far he's had really useful information. He's already done two How-To shows that I would like to syndicate: "How to Start a Blog" and "How to Start Podcasting in About an Hour." I would love to create a podcast. I don't know what I'd talk about, but at least thanks to Tom I know how to do it (and he explained it all in less than 12 minutes!).

10. TV Guide Talk - (updated weekly) Four TV Guide staffers get together to talk about what happened on the most popular shows of the week. Clocking in at just over an hour, this is a long show. I only listen with half an ear. I perk up when they start talking about a show that I actually watch, usually Gilmore Girls or Boston Legal. I'm usually working on my computer (maybe even posting on the blog) while they talk about Everwood or Lost or Alias or Prison Break or 24 or Veronica Mars. I tune back in when the fourth person finally speaks up about movies. Maitland usually only has time to talk about one or two movies. Sometimes they're movies I want to see, more often than not, no. But it is her recommendation that validated my desire to see "Stick It." According to Maitland, it is very witty and much more clever than your average teenage movie. So there. But she did warn adult men not to go see it alone for fear that they would look "creepy." I concur.

11. CBS News - Andy Rooney - (updated ?) Never a big fan of 60 minutes, I am surprised to discover that I enjoy Andy Rooney's podcast. Andy rants for 2 -5 minutes on various topics: newspaper articles, crap his fans send him in the mail, things he finds in his medicine cabinet, girl scout cookies... Uh, does this sound like anyone's blog we know? Hmmm. I've been borrowing Andy Rooney's schtick and I didn't even know it. He's been audioblogging for years but no one has credited him with starting the genre.

Now I have to start grouping podcasts together into categories. I don't listen to the following podcasts on a regular basis either because they aren't regularly broadcast or because they don't consistently feature stories that interest me.

12. History Related - There are two history podcasts that I will listen to if I'm really bored or if a topic just jumps out at me (like Tiananmen Square did). One is creatively called "HistoryPodcast", the other is more ostentaciously named "12 Byzantine Rulers: The History of the Byzantine Empire." The HistoryPodcast is produced by one guy. He researches a random subject from the not too far distant past, writes a term-paper-ish script and reads it to his listeners. The one time his girlfriend subbed for him was the most painful thing I've ever listened to. The podcast with Byzantine twice in its name (ByzSquared) is more narrowly focused on the Roman emperors during the Byzantine period. This is a period of history about which I know very little, so I'm looking forward to listening to these episodes. I just need to be in the right frame of mind (not distracted by a new Buzz Out Loud) for it.

13. Technology Related - I know I've already listed a couple of technology podcasts, but there are two more that are less important. One is on probation: "this WEEK in TECH" or tWiT. At over an hour, it's really long and the guys aren't that witty (the unforgivable sin). But this seems to be one of those podcasts that all other geeks listen to, so I almost feel like I have to listen to it. I'm being very judicious about the topics and only listen when it looks interesting. The other is more interesting, but only the technology segment. It is a Seattle based public radio show called "The Works with John Moe." John's 53 minute show features three segments, only one of which is about technology. So I can usually skip out after the first 20 minutes. He's covered some really interesting topics, including blogging and wikis. It feels relevant to my life.

14. News Related - CBS podcasts interesting segments from both Good Morning America and 60 minutes. When the topics are interesting, I listen. If they aren't, I delete.

15. Hollywood Related - The "Hollywood Wrap" is a local talk show where a guy interviews big stars about movies they're in. It's powder puff fluff. I may drop this one soon. The other is far more interesting - "The Treatment." I'm not sure who produces it, but it is an in-depth discussion with a current film-maker. They put out a new one today for Ed Norton. I can't wait to listen to that.

16. Travel Related - I'd like more for this category. So far I only have 2 minute segments from Arther Frommer, published by CBS. While I swear by Arther's guides and website, his podcasts leave something to be desired. He also talks too fast, somebody needs a lesson in modulation.

17. Random - There's another Russian language podcast called "Tanooshka" that I am just saving up. The whole thing is in Russian and I'm not quite ready for it yet. My fear is that once I am, I'll discover that it is really boring. The one episode I listened to, the girl was talking about her daily schedule - fascinating. Oh wait, isn't that what I do? I'm also storing up two (count 'em, two) podcasts related to the defunct TV show Firefly. The ones I really want to listen to are broadcasts of interviews featuring the shows creator, stars or various behind the scenes people. These are saved for really rainy days or really long car trips.

And I think I'm done. Thanks for reading this far. Go forth and catch your own pods.

Oops, not quite done. I forgot to tell you about the two shows from audible.com that I'm acutally paying to listen to.

1. Michael Feldman's Whad'Ya Know - (updated weekly) This 2 hour show would be number two or three on my list if I mixed the not-free shows in with the free ones. On top of my $9.95 yearly subscription to audible.com, I paid something like $32 for 12 months worth of this show (some of which will be reruns). That may sound extravagant, but seriously, this is the show that made me addicted to public radio. As I wrote in an email to the show when I couldn't find the podcast link, "Michael Feldman is more addictive than Crystal Meth. Please support by habit. Be my drug dealer and give me access to his show in podcast format." Surpisingly, a few short hours later, I received an email from one of the shows PA's telling me that I could buy the podcast at audible. That's all the justification I needed to get an audible account. I am back on my drug and feeling quite satisfied. (Oddly enough, Michael's another Jew who's style of witty banter I completely identify with. Was I meant to be a modern day Rebekah? Am I not married because I don't know any Jewish men in real life? Excuse me. I think I'm moving to New Yawk or Jerzsee.)

2. Says You - "A Game of Words and Whimsy, Bluff and Bluster." Another game show featuring two panels of guests on the topic of words and language. The host randomly assigns points for real or witty answers depending on how many clues he had to give the team before they got the answer. Proving that this 30 minute show is more about fun than winning, simply being right more often than the other team may not make you the winner. I paid almost as much for this show as I did for Whad'Ya Know. It is almost as good, but not quite.

NOW I am done. And done.

Celebrating Why I Have No Roads Left to Get to Work

For the past 4 or 5 years, the airport has been taking over the land around my office, knocking down homes, removing streets, closing down the good sandwich shop, etc. All this has been very inconvenient for me. I really loved that sandwich shop and the Secret Wendy's* that are both now gone. Why is my beloved Secret Wendy's gone? Because Atlanta needed a 5th runway. According to the airport's website, it is the "most important runway in the world."

Finally, the city is offering me something cool. They've planned a community event to let people walk around on the runway the weekend before it opens. Can you imagine having walked on I-75 before it opened? Or having been on top of the Peachtree Plaza before it was finished? This is the kind of event that you will always remember. This is a piece of Atlanta history. History in the making! I'm so there.

I know this is the day some (or all) of us are going to see World Party, but that's not until the evening. I'm going to send out an Evite to this event. I think it is really cool. I tried to talk my boss into taking his daughters. He didn't think they would like it.

“Community Day on the Fifth Runway”
Saturday, May 20, 2006
7:30 a.m. – 2:00 p.m.

5K on the Fifth Runway Fun Run
Registration begins at 6:00 a.m.
7:30 a.m. – 9:00 a.m.

Experience the once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to run on a 9,000 foot runway before it opens! Join Mayor Shirley Franklin and bring the family to enjoy this 3.1 mile event and say you were the first to run on the Fifth Runway.

Community Day
9:00 a.m. – 2:00 p.m.

Come one, come all to touch, see and feel what a 9,000 foot long, 150 foot wide runway looks like. A host of activities, musical performances and concessions will be available for all ages.


* Secret Wendy's was named by the man who hired me. Our office is situated between what used to be two fairly large roads (one of which has been sigficantly changed by the 5th runway). For years there was a Wendy's on each road. One of those Wendy's was always terribly busy at lunch, almost too busy to get in and out in an hour. One day, my boss realized that there was another Wendy's on the other road. To his astonishment, it was not busy at all during lunch. We started calling it Secret Wendy's because apparently no one knew about it. Eventually this Wendy's was discovered by other people. But before it closed, it had the fastest drive-through I've ever seen. I typically order sandwiches "without" certain items (imagine that). By the time I could drive to the window, this place was virtually throwing my custom sandwich in my car window and handing me my change. And now they're gone. I miss Secret Wendy's...

Where Have You Been?

create your own visited states map
or check out these Google Hacks.



create your own visited countries map
or vertaling Duits Nederlands

Life's Little Pleasures

I was the back car this morning. How fabulous.

More Details in the Light of Day

So this morning I woke up remembering more interesting details from the previous evening.

1. I am very pleased that we were joined by my reader Julie's sister (Funky Chick). She came over even though I don't think she was feeling too well. From what I could tell, she had a pleasant time despite the way she was feeling.

2. While everyone was getting their food and drinks, I noticed that one of the Russians didn't have ice in his drink. I had just put the ice out into the sink and thought he may have missed it. So without thinking I said, "There's ice in the sink." I immediately felt like a Stoopid American and mumbled to myself, "but you don't need ice 'cause you're Russian." Evidently, he didn't hear me and answered, "I don't like ice." It was such a classic moment of two cultures colliding. And stuff like that isn't supposed to happen to me. I've lived around Russians. I know their little quirks.

3. Putting me in the Stoopid American category again, I forgot to prepare hot tea. I still have the tea set I bought in Moscow. But even though I was weel prepared to have lots of people over, I completely forgot to have tea ready. After dinner, the Armenian asked, "Do you have tea?" They had brought a jug of sweet tea with them. But of course, he wanted hot tea. It would have been really nice if I could have accommodated him. Oh well, next time.

4. Entertaining just isn't as big of a deal as so many people make it out to be. When the last few Russians were getting ready to leave, I was a little overwhelmed at how much mess I had to clean up. Fabulous Julie cleaned up quite a bit before she left, but there was still a ton left to do. I knew there was no way I was going to get to it that night. But at the last minute one of the Russian sisters realized how messy it was and offered to clean up. One of the couples wanted to look at my bedroom, so I took them upstairs. By the time we came back down, everything was as organized as it could be and she was even sweeping my floor. See? If you invite the right people, entertaining is not a burden at all. I loaded the rest of the stuff into the dishwasher this morning and my kitchen is almost back to normal. (I just have a little bit of cake left.)

Two Late Nights

Good Soup Friday was lots of fun even though I've had to stop eating Good Soup. (It does not agree with my tummy.) We had 14 people show up for dinner. The interesting thing was that I didn't know 5 of them. Good Soup Friday has become so popular that complete strangers are begging to come. Cool.

Afterwards we watched The Bourne Supremacy. Even though I really wanted to watch The Saint, I bowed to the wishes of my guests. They just don't know that we're going to watch The Saint next week. [insert evil grin here]

Today was majorly busy. I had bookstudy this morning followed by pseudoservice. (I did other people's calls...actually I never got out of the car because there was always some legitimate reason why someone else needed to go on a particular call. And before I knew it, we were done.) The Polyglot and I ate lunch with a really fabulous couple. He's known them for ages, but I am just getting to know them. I adore them...as does everyone.

I had about an hour's break before The Polyglot and I rushed off the to Russian meeting. It was supposed to be the first meeting after they had officially become a congregation. I didn't find out until later that they have not quite received the paperwork and so won't be official until next week. Foiled!

Thinking that my friends from the Southside would come up for the meeting, I called them earlier in the week to see if they wanted to come over afterwards. As it turns out only their daughter was coming, so I at least invited her. I extended the invitation to one brother who comes pretty regularly to Good Soup. He asked if I would include the speaker, one of the brothers who has worked so hard for years to build up the Russian group. I said sure and before I knew it, I had a full blown party on my hands.

Let me say that the Russian group has really changed over the last few months. I couldn't believe how many native speakers were at the meeting today. There were 60 people at the meeting, but they only have a little over 30 publishers. I heard the Special Talk (again). I'm always surprised at how much of the talks I understand. I still can't read and understand as well as I can listen and understand. That is odd to me because in order for me to really remember something I have to see it in writing.

So on to the party. After the meeting, the speaker kept asking me if he could invite more people. I had anticipated that, so I gave my full consent. My big fear was getting people from the Hall to my house. There were only three drivers who knew how to get there. We each had people following us. I finally had to leave and let the majority of the people follow the one brother who knows how to get to my place.

Let me say a big thank you (bolshoi spaceba) to The Polylot for manning the grill...at least until the Armenian showed up. I don't know that I could have grilled all that food and kept my mind on the little things that needed to happen. Eventually the Russians showed up (with more food) and the Armenian (who I didn't realize was Armenian) took over the grill. The Polyglot was relieved to just sit down and display his polyglotness to da peoples. There were 16 people in my house tonight, all speaking a mix of Russian and English (Ruglish? Russlish?).

The big surprise was the two "native" couples (one of the wives is American, but that's OK, God still loves her). I loved them! I don't know their ages, but they're somewhere between me and The Polyglot. They are super cool and lots of fun. Before I knew it, it was midnight but I still didn't want them to go home. The really coolest thing is that one of the brothers is originally from Moscow and we know at least one brother in common. He knew my old bookstudy overseer fairly well. This same brother works with computers and we just happen to have an opening in our department right now. I don't know if the job will pay enough, but that would be really cool.

Anyway, I sat around for a long time talking to them about Russia and Moscow and just all the things that only people who've lived in both cultures would understand. I'm going to try to go to maybe one meeting a month. I know that doesn't sound like much, but I just can't make the change right now.

I'm very happy that I was able to meet such cool people this weekend. The new people at Good Soup last night were nice and all these Russians were facinating. It's been a long time since I've met new people on a regular basis. I'm also very happy that I can do it in my own home. Even if I met new people on the Southside, no one ever wanted to come over to Stinky Garbage Trailer. It may as well have been the other side of the planet.

The last interesting tidbit is that The Polyglot may have acquired a new nickname ... The Poliglot (pronounce pole-e-glot). The Russians told him that he has a Polish accent when he speaks Russian. Who knew? And as always, they told me that I look Russian. I will continue to take it as a compliment even though I think it just means "you're really really white."

It's now after 1 am on Sunday morning. I think I'm going to sleep in...

Brrrrrrrrng Brrrrrrrrrng - Hello Moto

I got a new phone this week. I have to admit that I was suffering from phone envy - all you people with your camera phones taking photos in Ingles of goofy things that I want to blog about. I waited to replace my phone until it had a full length crack running down the screen. Although that didn't seem to affect the functioning of the phone, it was a decent excuse to dump it.

Well, I didn't actually dump it. It is ... I don't know the terminology for it, but it can connect to the phone networks over in Europe. So next time I'm there, I can rent a SIM card and BANG! I have mo-bile (rhymes with "go file", not to be confused with the apparatus hanging over a baby's crib) service.

Here's a link to my new phone (though I didn't pay that much for it) - http://us.gizmodo.com/gadgets/cellphones/motorola-v360-from-tmobile-136366.php.

If you know what "high-speed EDGE capabilities" are, fill me in please. I got no clue, but it sounds exciting. Hooty hooty. I haven't hooked it up to my 'puter through Bluetooth yet, but I'm looking forward to doing so. I think sending photos back and forth through T-Mobile's messaging service is gonna get expensive. So far, I have shot some pretty cool wallpapers.

Anagrams

I was thinking about the anagrams that The Polyglot loves so much. I found a website that builds anagrams for you. My real name anagrams into the perfect explanation for why I'm not (or ever will be) married ... "deter him." Check out your own names...

http://www.wordsmith.org/anagram/

Hump Day Photo!

Uh oh, now that I gotta compete with the compelling story telling of The Polyglot, I have to bring out the big guns. He can't quite keep up with me visually...yet.

This looks like the setting sun, but it was actually taken early one morning on my way to work. I stepped out of Stinky Garbage Trailer and this is what I saw over the roof of my car.

I'm Contagious!

The 'Glot has started a BLOG! I'm putting up a permanent link to it. But here's a temporary one:

http://foreignwords.blogspot.com/

YaY me! YaY The Ployglot! YaY the readers! YaY the Irish!

Boo the Faux Polyglot who took the Real Polyglot's blogger name. (Just like the phony pony Horsenbuggy who took my name.)

More Moments with Microsoft

I was sitting in a meeting today with a couple of Microsoft employees. They came in to meet with me and my boss (the CIO) to explain how a particular server product works. One of the Microsoft guys has worked with my boss for a couple of years, the other Microsoft lady has been building a relationship with me over the last few months. We tele- and web-conferenced in one of their colleagues in another city.

So imagine the scene: four of us in my boss' office, a conference phone on his desk and a mini-projector shining the web conference up on his office wall. The meeting was going very well. The guy in the other city was nearing the end of his demonstation. The final step required him to pull up his personal Hotmail account to prove to us that certain files could not be sent outside the company to be read.

I'll interrupt to ask - do you use Hotmail? Even if you don't, I'm sure you're familiar with the concept of targeted banner ads. Hotmail pays for their "free" mail service by pushing out banner ads (like the one rolling at the top of this very blog screen what do you know, blogger doesn't use banner ads anymore) to their users. They are smart enough to know that not all ads will appeal to all people. They use as much information as you supply to them to push out ads that they think you will respond to.

OK, so what banner ad was showing on this Microsoft employee's Hotmail screen? An ad to a game called ... "Light the Fart, Win a Free Phone." I seriously couldn't make that up if I tried - not even I am that funny. To make it even worse, the graphics on the ad were sooooooo non-business-situation-friendly. The ad showed cartoon drawings of butts of various shapes and sizes (some even naked) expelling gas from between their cheeks. I think you played the game by moving a lighter over the specific butt that was expelling gas at the right moment to light the fart on fire. (To think I've been wasting my time playing Scrabble and Sudoku when I could have been playing "Light the Fart".)

Anyway, it took every ounce of self-control I had to maintain my composure. I couldn't even begin to look at my boss for fear that we'd both bust out laughing. I just made a little note on my paper so that I would remember to blog about it.

The backside (pun intended) of this story is that I started thinking about those targeted ads. I went to my Hotmail account and hit refresh several times, but never saw that ad. It lead me to the conclusion that they wouldn't push that ad out to a woman in her 30s. That lead me to think about the one ad they do push out to me that is a pain in my rear end (pun intended). I get inundated by ads for online dating services. That wouldn't be so bad except the ads feature very scantily clad women. Why can't they feature stylishly dressed young men? To end this dating ad crap (pun intended), I went to my profile and told Microsoft that I was married. I have refreshed several times since...it looks like the dating ads have stopped. I'm now getting ads targeting young mothers, but those are much less offensive. Take that ad-pushing people!

It's Russian Week!!!

Crazy Ivan says it's time to go crazy nuts over everything Russian! (Hey look... Crazy Ivan is an anagram for Czary Ivan.) I've been listening to a very basic podcast for Russian language. While it is too remedial for me, each episode is short and kinda entertaining. I thought I'd link the website for anyone (not The 'Glot) who wants to learn how to say the basics in Russian.

http://speakrussian.blogspot.com

(It's unfortunate that the most recent lesson teaches you how to say Happy Birthday. Start with Lesson 1.)

Paka!

T-shirts coming soon!

Here's the image that I'm going to put on a t-shirt over at CafePress.com sometime this week:

Third Best City for Swingles

Forbes Magazine rated San Francisco the third best city for singles in 2006. According to Roomie, it is, 'the most immoral place he's ever been'. He was there for not quite 48 hours and never wants to return. (I'm guessing that he didn't leave his heart there.)

Infectious Laughter and I visited the Bay City several years ago for a few days. All I can say is that we must not have been to the same places Roomie went. We thought it was a lovely city, though I'm sure I would soon tire of all the open gayness if I lived there.