Me and My Imaginary Friends

The only true currency in this bankrupt world is what you share with someone else when you're uncool.

Wednesday, September 26, 2007

TV Season is BACK!

And I am a very happy girl.

Before I begin, I want to fully acknowledge that I watch entirely too much television. 

Let me tell you about a few new shows:

Chuck - NBC, Mondays at 8
So far, this is my favorite new show.  NBC had the pilot episode available On Demand before it actually aired this week.  I watched it twice.  Then I watched it again when it actually aired on Monday - that's three stinking times.  First, let me say that you completely have to suspend disbelief to watch this show.  But once you do, it's a really fun ride.  Chuck (played by Zachary Levi, who was last seen as Kip on Less Than Perfect) is a smart college drop-out (or he was possibly kicked out of college) who hasn't been able to get his life back on track.  He's still hung up on his old girlfriend.  He makes $11/hr as the team leader for the Nerd Herd at Buy More (substitute Geek Squad and Best Buy to get the picture).  He lives with his doctor sister and her doctor boyfriend (who he calls Captain Awesome because he is such an alpha-male who overuses the word "awesome").  Most of his free time is spent hanging out and playing video games with his best friend, Morgan, who also works at Buy More.  Chuck's old roommate from college, Brice (possibly the guy who got him kicked out, definitely the guy who stole his girlfriend), is now a rogue CIA agent.  Brice steals "all" the secrets that were being shared between the CIA and the NSA and sends them to Chuck. 

OK, this is where you have to suspend disbelief.  The secrets are revealed to Chuck through a lightning-paced, epilepsy-inducing series of flashing images that lasts for an entire evening.  At the end of the "message," Chuck's only awareness of the event is a hang-over sized headache (hey! I know what that feels like).  The CIA and NSA each dispatch agents to find out who received Brice's message and determine the threat level.  Naturally, the CIA agent is a bombshell blond who investigates the situation by going out on a date with Chuck.  There are some great scenes/dialog between Chuck and his sister and Chuck and his best friend leading up to date night.  Chuck even earns a "That's awesome!" from Captain Awesome.  The NSA agent (played by Adam Baldwin, who was last seen as Jayne in Firefly/Serenity) only wants to eliminate the threat (Chuck). 

But how could they get a show out of that?  Of course, Chuck convinces both agents that they "need" him and that he can actually help them decipher the information they collected (and have now lost). 

The real genius of this show is not in the flimsy geek turned government agent premise.  The real genius is in the writing and character interaction.  Zac Levi plays his role to perfection.  And don't get me started on the guy who plays his best friend - he's hilarious (or annoying, depending on your perspective).  There are also a few minor characters that are part of the Nerd Herd who will hopefully get some screentime, but not too much 'cause I think they will steal every scene they're in.  (Keep an eye out for the one named Jeff.)  The relationship between Chuck and his sister is portrayed very well.  And Captain Awesome is, in a word, awesome. 

If you missed the season premiere, you can watch it online at nbc.com.  If you have On Demand, it may still be available there, but I don't think so.

Journeyman - NBC, Mondays at 10
This show was much better than I expected it to be.  I only recognized one of the actors - the hero's brother, but don't ask me to tell you where I've seen him.  The lead actor is a Scottish guy named Kevin McKidd.  McKidd plays ... I don't remember the character's name - a reporter living in modern day San Francisco.  The Reporter is married with a son who looks to be about 5.  One day The Reporter is simply transported through time - no explanation, just BAM!, he's in SF circa 1999.  There seems to be no rhyme or reason to how or why he gets there, or how long he stays gone.  During the course of the show he is transported back in time on three separate occasions.  The first time, he is only "gone" from his own time for an hour or so, making him late for dinner with his wife.  The second and third times, he is gone for two or three days each.  He eventually figures out that his "trips" seem to put him in contact with one man.  He successively 1) saves the man's life 2) talks the man's girlfriend out of having an abortion and 3) no, I won't spoil the last thing he accomplishes.  As he jumps back and forth in time, he uses his Reporter investigating skills to check up on the man in Present Day.  (And to convince himself that it wasn't all a dream.)

Backstory - He was engaged to (and nearly married) a woman named Livia.  Livia died in a plane crash just before their wedding.  At some point after that, he ended up marrying the woman who was dating his brother.  Huh.  I thought it was going to be more difficult to explain that. 

The Present - At some point, The Reporter and his wife have had problems, possibly even related to him being a drug abuser.  When he goes missing for days at a time, she assumes the worst and arranges an intervention for him.  He tries to explain what's going on, but of course, he can't do so without sounding insane.  There are some very real moments between him and his wife (and son).  They don't just gloss over this like many TV shows have done before, "What? You say that you travel through time, saving people's lives?  That's kinda hard to believe, but if you say so..."  However, the viewer wouldn't feel too comfortable watching him help other people knowing that his own life is in a shambles.  So, in the end, they have a nice way of making her realize that he's been telling the truth.

I really don't think this show will last.  I thought it was pretty interesting and I'd like to watch it.  But it's too sci-fi-y to be a drama and too drama-y to be pure fun sci-fi.  I like the mix, but I'm weird.  Again, you can catch the pilot at nbc.com.

Life - NBC, Wednesdays at 10
Yeah, this one isn't going to last.  The only thing that made me even half-way interested was the final scene, but that was enough to make me tune in next week.  This is a procedural cop show (of the kind I really don't watch any more) with one story arc that will be unwound during the season.  So, it should have a little of everything for everybody.  But I don't think the procedural portion (the weekly cases) will be exciting enough to grab people's interests. 

A cop (detective?) was arrested and incarcerated for a crime he did not commit.  After 15 years in prison, he is back on the job.  He's got more money than he knows what to do with since he successfully sued the justice system over his wrongful imprisonment.  But still, he has chosen to work instead of live off his untold riches.  He's got some issues - his wife divorced him while he was in prison.  He has fun giving her new husband tickets for minor traffic violations (I didn't know detectives could do that).  He went through a lot while in prison, being a cop and all.  While in the clink, he took up the study of Zen Buddhism.

That leads me to things about his personality that are supposed to be quirky, but are just random. He's working this Zen thing, so he says random non-sense things about "the moment" or about being "calm."  He also LOVES fruit.  And I don't just mean that he seems to always have a piece of fruit in his hand.  I mean, the other characters mention how much he loves fruit in almost every scene.  Enough already, I get it.  He LOVES fruit.  Just let him eat his fruit, stop telling me how much he loves to eat fruit.  He is completely baffled by modern technology.  When his old partner recognizes him in the station and wants to take his photo, he says, "That's a phone, not a camera."  When his cellphone rings at a suspect's house, he looks around to see why no one is answering the house phone.  Finally, his new partner says, "Are you gonna get that?" and motions to his pants pocket.  With a surprised look on his face, he says, "Oh, that's me."  He doesn't understand the term "IM", nor how to use Google.  His is a detective, so he picks these things up, but seriously?  There was no TV in his cushy prison?

I don't think I'm spoiling anything by telling you the ending - in fact, it may be the only reason you decide to tune in tonight.  After the case is wrapped up (too easily) and all his quirks are exposed, we finally figure out why he decided to go back to work.  He's got a very interesting organizational chart on the wall of his bedroom closet.  Under a sign that reads, "Follow the money," there is a whole network of people who are obviously related to his original arrest.  He has filled in many of the squares with photos of people we've already met in the episode.  Some of those people have already been "x"ed through to show that they were not involved.  Some of the lines lead to empty boxes.  I'm sure the real point of this show is going to be filling in those empty boxes and getting to the bottom of a big conspiracy.  I didn't see this coming.  If they give me more to this storyline next week, I may be hooked.  And I usually HATE season long arcs.


Returning favorites:
Stargate Atlantis - SciFi, Fridays at 10 - The fourth season begins this Friday.  The annoying Dr. Weir is gone, replaced by Samantha Carter from the original series.  The last time we saw the gang, they had just launched their city-sized ship into space.  Duhn, Duhn, Duhn.  Tune in to see what happens.

The Office - NBC, Thursdays at 9 - The fourth season begins tomorrow night and IT'S A DATE!  The last time we saw the Dunder-Mifflin gang, Ryan got the VP job at Corporate and Jim finally asked Pam out on a real date.  We get hour-long episodes until half-way through October.  Woo hoo!

OK, I'll let you go.  Wait, do you want to hear about soccer now?

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Monday, September 24, 2007

First Pu Yi, Now Starbucks

Those Chinese are really picky about who lives in the Forbidden City.  First, they kicked out Emperor Pu Yi, now they've kicked out Starbucks.  Starbucks opened a small shop in an unobtrusive corner of the Forbidden City back in 2000.  Even though it removed all outer signage, Chinese people still thought it was a cultural travesty to have the shop inside the Forbidden City.  We were fortunate enough to visit the controversial coffee shop before it was closed down.  I quite enjoyed the experience.  But I admit that we'd had a harrowing day in Beijing and I wasn't in the mood to be very culturally sensitive at the time. 

As a matter of fact, a couple of the people in our group were interviewed about their opinions on the shop while we there.  I didn't hear the entire interview, but I think they acknowledged the difficulty of balancing cultural uniqueness while opening up to Western business and tourism.  It's been a while since I've been to the Kremlin, but I guess I would be surprised to find a Starbucks inside there, no matter how low-key it was.  So I guess I don't feel strongly either way about whether it should have been closed or allowed to stay open.  I'm just glad that I got the chance to visit it while it was open - I'm part of a small historical footnote. 

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Friday, September 21, 2007

Not so in love with Jews right this moment

Y'all know I have a special fondness in my heart for the wit and sarcasm of Jewish men (and Mehsha).  But I'm more than a little peeved with Jewish holidays right now.  I ordered a fancy new lens for my camera back in the spring.  The order was put on hold until the lenses actually shipped from the manufacturer (yes, I'm trying to be an early adopter in this case).  But I thought that my order would process as soon as the lenses came in.  Isn't that the point of a "pre-order"?  Evidently not.  

I got an email a few weeks ago telling me that my pre-ordered lens was now available and I could order it if I wanted to.  Well, that's annoying.  I finally got around to calling last week.  The store, which is in NYC and run by Jews, was closed for the Jewish New Year.  (That reminds me of the year that T and I made it a point to get together with one of our friends on every Jewish holiday.  Good times.)  I saw a brief mention on the interweb that Yom Kippur begins tonight, so I made a quick call to the store to check on the status of my order.  I got a message stating that the store is closed for the holiday. 

Wait a second.  We ALL know that the Jewish day begins at sundown.  Yom Kippur doesn't begin until TONIGHT.  Why did they shut down today?  Are they milking this holiday thing?  I didn't know the Jews celebrated Yom Kippur Eve.  Yom Kippur is the Day of Atonement.  In Biblical times, this is when the whole nation would come together to place their sins on a goat and send it wandering off into the wilderness (thus introducing to our consciousness the concept of a scapegoat).  So, what?  They party up the night before so that they have even more sins for which to atone the next day?

I just checked Wikipedia (the greatest site on the internets).  I learned that Yom Kippur Eve is, in fact, a day of celebration.  It seems that Jews are required to fast for 25 hours on Yom Kippur.  They prepare themselves to last the whole day without food with a huge feast on Yom Kippur Eve. 

I still don't have an answer about the camera lens that I want to have before I go to the Grand Canyon because a bunch of yankee Jews are gluttoning themselves.  Oy vey.

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Clarification

I wanted to clarify the last paragraph of the post I made earlier about I Dunno.  After reviewing that post, I realized that it may seem like I was referring only to male friends in that last paragraph.  I wasn't.  Even though I started out talking about my male friends, my brain transitioned to all my old friends that I don't see on a regular basis any more.  So when I wrote about my friend on a different continent, in a different hemisphere, I was talking about the African Hag, not her husband (who was kinda my friend before they married, but not the kind of close friend that I was talking about).  But, you all knew that, right?

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Sorry, I Lied

I told you good people that I would not make another soccer post until next week.  Well, I lied.  I just read one of the funniest articles and I had to post a link to it.  The article is a collection of quotes made over the last three years by Jose Mourinho, the Chelsea manager who just up and quit. 

I've seen that people in the press refer to Mourinho as "the special one," but I never understood that reference.  This collection of quotes not only explained it, it had me cracking up at how arrogant one person can be (and how bad one man can be at making up metaphors).

Please read this even if you hate my soccer postings.

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Who is this man?

I got a phone call yesterday from a number that I didn't recognize.  It was a local number and I am still trying to sell Stinky Garbage Trailer, so I picked it up.  Here is the conversation and the thoughts that went through my head (thoughts are in italics):

Me: Hello.
Unidentified Man: HnB?
Me: Yeah. (Who is this guy?)
Man: Can I get you to do me a favor?
Me: Sure. (Crap.  Who am I agreeing to do a favor for?  He seems to know me.  Uh, he seems to know me well enough that he didn't think he needed to tell me who it is.  Who IS this?  It kinda sounds like Chewy, but we haven't been this close in years.)
Man: Could you tape a show for me tonight?
Me: Sure.  (What man would ask me to tape a show for him?)
Man: [slight stutter] It's "Burn Notice" on USA at 9.
Me: Yeah, no problem. "Burn Notice."  What's it about? (Did he just stutter?  This isn't a man.  This is I Dunno.  Holy crap.  He sounds like Chewy.  A lot.  I can't believe I mistook my 15 year old nephew for a man.)
I Dunno: It's about ....

So, the rest of the conversation is not interesting.  I can't believe that I honestly had no idea who I was talking to for the first 30 - 60 seconds of that conversation.  I've always thought it was funny that part of the work I Dunno does for his father is to make cold calls on businessmen.  I thought, "Why would anyone listen to a 14/15 year old boy trying to set up an appointment to sell them a service?"  Well, I now have proof that people on the other end of the phone have no idea that they are speaking to a 15 year old boy.  If he can fake me out, he can certainly fake out a complete stranger. 

And on a completely different note, I want to mention how much I miss Chewy.  I saw him for the first time in years last month.  I know it's not really possible for a man and woman to stay friends after one of them marries.  But that doesn't mean that I don't miss our friendship.  He was truly a part of my family.  I've had so many close guy friends get married and move away.  I miss them all, but he was the one that I never thought I'd lose touch with.  I guess people come and go in your life.  You treasure them while you've got 'em and you do your best to hang on to the ones you really can't live without (even if they're on a different continent, in a different hemisphere).

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A missed shout-out from Frommer's

I figured out last week that Arthur Frommer linked to another photo of mine back in August.  The blog post is pretty interesting and the photo is extraordinary!

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Thursday, September 20, 2007

Yet Another Soccer Post

Good news on the soccer front.  Arsenal is leading their league!  Granted, we're only 5 games into a 40 game season, but still, we're on top.  On top is a great way to begin the season.  It is especially wonderful this season, our first without Henry.  So many people questioned how well we would play without our leader.  So far the answer has been, "Fanstinkingtastic."

Enough gloating.  Well, not quite.

So, last weekend we played our big rivals, the Tottenham Hotspurs.  (Don't ya just love soccer team names?)  They go by "Spurs" for short - can't imagine why.  Spurs went out and spent a ton of money over the summer, something like $30mill, to buy better players.  Before last weekend, Spurs hadn't beaten us in 18 games (2 games per season, ...carry the two) which equates to around 9 years.  I don't know, maybe there were some Cup games thrown in that mix, so maybe it was closer to 6 or 7 years.  Regardless, it's been a long time since they've beaten us.

Given the relative youth of our side and the uncertainty around "the big Henry shake-up," everyone thought Spurs were due this year.  Gooners (the affectionate name for obsessed Arsenal fans like me) all over the world held our collective breath, hoping that our team could maintain the great form they'd shown in the first few games of the season.  Well, the Spurs scored first.  Dang.  But it wasn't over.  My boys came back to score three goals in the second half. 

We beat Tottenham 3-1.  That is a solid thumping in the world of soccer.  Where was the match played?  At Tottenham's home stadium.  We beat them in their own house, for the 19th time in a row!  I literally stood up and jumped up and down in my house when they scored the third goal.  I quickly sat back down when I realized that I was alone and sitting in the room where there are no blinds on the windows.  No need to scare the neighbors.

Last night, Arsenal played the Spanish team Sevilla in a UEFA Champions League match.  (UEFA = Union of European Football Associations.  They organize a "cup" or "tournament" that runs the whole season where the best teams from each national league play against each other.  It's almost like a Team World Cup, but only the top teams from each league qualify to play.  Matches are spreadout through the whole season, with the final happening in May or June.)  I mentioned Sevilla in my last soccer posting.  They just had a young player die in the middle of a match.  They are playing really well and were supposed to be one of the most formidable teams we play in our Cup schedule. 

We trounced them 3-0.  Trounced, I say.

What makes this even more unbelievable is the identity of the man leading Arsenal to these victories.  A 20 year old kid named Cesc Fabregas.  He's amazing.  He's scored in almost every match in which he's played so far.  That's quite an accomplishment, especially for his position.  You see, Cesc plays in a really key position, but it's not necessarily one that leads to lots of scoring.  It's his job to move the game along, get the ball down the pitch and get it to the guys who do the scoring.  He is involved in most big plays, but usually he assists instead of scoring.  He was so brilliant at this part of his job last year that he took the fans' pick as "Player of the Year" by a landslide.  He got that accolade despite only scoring twice during the entire season.  Twice!  He's already scored 3 times (in regular league games, 6 when you count "cup" games) and it's only September.  I know, things change.  Guys get hurt or go through a dry spell.  But I didn't think I could get any more impressed with this kid than I was last year.  Boy, was I wrong.  He blows me away each time I watch him. 

The best part?  Cesc seems to really like playing for Arsenal.  As you may have surmised from his unusual name, Francesc Fabregas is not English, he's Spanish.  There's always a suspicion niggling in the back of my mind that guys from European countries will want to play "at home" after they get enough experience in England.  I guess I won't mind if he goes home at some point, but I really don't want that day to come for a long, long time.  If he keeps on progressing as he has, he could literally be one of the greatest central midfielders this game has ever seen.

OK, done with that.

Oh, more good news about the Arsenal manager, Arsene Wenger.  The last time we spoke, I told you that I thought he would stick around at the club for a little while despite rumors that he was going to leave.  Yeah, I was right.  He signed a 3 year deal with the club last week.  Whew!

Now the rumor mill is working overtime talking about the ownership of the club.  Evidently, it is a public company in the sense that they sell "shares."  But the majority of those shares belong to either one man or one family.  This family has owned Arsenal for a really long time.  There's some rich Russian dude who just bought a major block of shares to increase his stake to like 20% of the company.  Everyone is speculating that he's trying to orchestrate a hostile takeover to get control of the club.  The main owners have emphasized that they won't let that happen - the club doesn't need money so they don't need to sell any of their shares and lose control.  I think that's true and can't imagine them willingly giving up their stake in the club.  It could be bad news if the Russian dude gets control of the club. 

That's a good segue to the news that Chelsea's manager, Jose Mourinho, just quit because he could no longer deal with their rich Russian owner.  Chelsea is a really big club that have pumped massive amounts of cash into buying fantastic (and expensive) players over the last couple of years.  They finished second in the league last year.  Everyone thought that they would finish on top this year.  But now that their manager is gone, I don't see that happening.  You can't lose a manager and keep a bunch of spotlight-hogging superstars playing like a solid unit.  Egos get in the way, especially when guys think they have to prove themselves to the new manager.  No one knows where Mourinho will end up.  But Chelsea has already appointed a new manager who people are speculating will only be a season-long temp.

More bad news for Chelsea?  They play Manchester United on Sunday - the team who won the league last year.  I expect Chelsea to crumble. 

Up next for Arsenal?  We play Derby, the second to worst club in the league.  I don't want a cheap victory, but I certainly don't expect to lose to Derby.  (By the way, it really annoys me that English people pronounce that word as "Darby.")

And... I think I'm done.  You can all rest easy, no more soccer posts until next week.  You made it through.  It wasn't that bad, was it?

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Wednesday, September 19, 2007

Accomplishments

I am right proud of myself.  Let me 'splain why.

First of all, you have to understand that I deeply and thoroughly despise accounting.  I don't even balance my checkbook.  But I work for the VP of Finance.  So I'm constantly getting lessons on things like Profit calculations, asset accounts vs. expense accounts, write off calculations, etc.  I've been exposed to this stuff for a very long time.  None of it has ever sunk in.  OK, some of it has sunk in.  I understand, at the most basic level, that if you make an entry into one account, you need to make a corresponding entry into a different account.  Those things are called debits and credits, but don't ask me to explain which is which and when one is negative and when one is positive.  I'm spent.

For months, possibly even a year, my boss has been talking about conquering this particular financial report.  It is a spreadsheet that would blend real and projected information from our accounting system and allow us to evaluate the strength of sales offers prospects make on our homes.  Basically, we have to be able to calculate what we 1) have already spent on the house, 2) what we think we will still spend on the construction of the house, 3) what we think or have spent on loans, taxes and fees, and 4) what we will spend to sell the house (including closing costs).  Once the "big man" evaluates a deal and decides that it is within an acceptable profit range, we should then go back after the house closes to see if we were correct.  Did we make as much money on the deal as we thought we would?

Naturally, the first time my boss explained everything he wanted to accomplish with this report, my head exploded.  I have slowly been reassembling the pieces of my cranium whilst trying to come to terms with this beast of a report. 

I think I just finished it.  Excuse me while I cram this last sliver of cerebrum back into place.  [sluuuuuuuurp]  OK.  I'm back.  I'm looking at this report and realizing that not only have I finished this very impressive report that no one before me could create, I also kinda have a handle on accounting concepts.  I no longer want to jab thumbtacks into my eyeballs when my boss prattles on about WIP vs Cost After Sales. 

We still have to beat it up before we hand it off to the "big man" (my boss' boss).  But by the time we do that, I can't imagine there being any more changes he will want.  (I know, famous last words.)  The thing is that my boss' boss hasn't asked for this report.  This is just something that my boss wanted me to create as a "Holy crap! Look what we can do now that we're on a fancy new system" kind of thing.  He's hoping that his boss will be amazed and thrilled that he has a much easier (and more accurate) way of dealing with this problem. 

We'll see.

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Ahoy Mateys

It be International Talk Like a Pirate Day.  Buckle yer swashes and shiver yer timbers.  Argg.

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Tuesday, September 18, 2007

My assignment

Welp, I completed my first photo assignment.  I have no idea how I did. 

The fund raiser was a fairly big to-do, though it wasn't strictly a "black tie" affair.  I got there before it started, around 5:45.  I found the Chairperson for the event and explained why I was there.  At first she asked if I had purchased a "media" ticket.  That's when I dropped some names.  I explained that my "Editor" was supposed to have spoken with the Athletic Director about sending me over to cover the event.  I was going to write that she "backed down," but she never seemed to really care that I didn't have a media ticket.  She had nice things to say about the paper I was shooting for. 

It was a little awkward because they'd hired a company to photograph the event.  It was kinda like a prom where guests could get their photos taken under lights and in front of a backdrop.  Odd.  One of the photographers also walked around shooting the room.  I didn't see them shooting people just in the crowd, though.  It took me a while to get my "press" legs (those are like sea legs).  Y'all know that I'm not one to sidle up to people and start chatting away.  I skulked in the background for quite a while getting the lay of the land.  Eventually, I screwed up enough courage to approach a pleasant looking couple to ask if I could shoot their photo for the local paper.  Of course, they were happy to oblige.  Thankfully, I had my wits about me enough to get their names and ask if they were parents. 

After that first encounter, it was much easier to stop people to take photos.  I met some interesting people.  One group of ladies wanted me to take several photos of them.  I did, but then I didn't submit all of those - too redundant.  One pair of men were very jovial.  They acted like they would pay me off to get their photos in the paper.  I told them that I didn't really have control over editorial decisions but that I would try.  I submitted their photo.  I stopped another man who was wearing a jersey under his coat, but over his shirt and tie.  I had to get the story behind that.  It was his Lacrosse jersey from college.  I asked him to pose so that I could see the jersey in the photo.  I hope that photo makes it in.

The main attraction of the evening was the live auction.  There were several interesting trips and items up for bid.  I was surprised at how my taste in vacations seems to differ from the people who were bidding.  There were two swordfish fishing trips, all expenses paid, in Costa Rica that went for dirt cheap because no one was interested in them.  I couldn't believe it.  They sounded like dream vacations to me.  But then houses/condos up for 1 week rental in Florida went for big bucks.  Seriously?  These rich people would rather go to Florida than to a resort on Costa Rica?  I don't get it.

The best auctions were "experiences" with local people.  Coaches from several teams offered themselves up to cook for a dinner party of 8 people.  Even the mayor of the little town auctioned himself off to cook for a party of 8 (his daughter attends that school and evidently plays sports).  I had no idea that Lacrosse was such a big deal in our area.  The girls team from this school has been "Champions" for three years in a row.  The lowest bid of this type was for the baseball coaches - only $800.  Next came the mayor at $2200, then the girls Lacrosse coaches at $2300, followed by the boys Lacrosse coaches at $2500.  The highest bid (for anything all evening) was for dinner cooked by the football coaches at $5000.  Five grand!  And the baseball coaches only pulled in 800 bucks.  Isn't baseball America's national past time?  How is Lacrosse more popular than baseball?  They didn't even offer up the soccer or basketball coaches. 

I think the paper has a print deadline of Monday.  I tried to get in touch with my editor on Sunday, but he didn't return my call or text.  He finally got back to me yesterday.  By then I was working and couldn't get the photos to him.  I finally got the photos to him this morning.  (Or tried to, I got a couple of error messages from email.)  I don't know if I was in time to get the photos in this Friday's edition.  I don't know if my photos are good enough to print.  I don't know if they will use them next week if they were too late for this week.  This is now a wait and see game.

If my photos do make it in to the paper, I will email each of you the link.  Since the photos will have my real name attached to them, I won't link them from here.

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Monday, September 17, 2007

Now this is more like it

I got a more familiar spam message today.

[begin spam]

Dear Sir,
 
I KNOW THIS WILL COME TO YOU AS A SURPRISE BECAUSE YOU DO NOT KNOW ME I AM MR.MICHAEL TAYLOR, THE SON OF THE FORMER LIBERIA PRESIDENT MR. CHARLES TAYLOR. MY FAMILY AND I IS ON EXILE. PLEASE, I WANT YOU TO HELP ME CLEAR THIS PACKAGE THAT IS ALREADY IN AMERICA WHICH I SHIPPED THROUGH DIPLOMATIC MEANS WITH THE HELP OF A DIPLOMAT BUT THE CONTENTS OF THE PACKAGE ALL IN  BILLS, BUT THE DIPLOMAT DOES NOT KNOW THAT IT IS MONEY THAT I HAVE IN THE PACKAGE.

ALL I WANT YOU TO DO FOR ME NOW IS THIS, GIVE ME YOUR MAILING ADDRESS, YOUR PRIVATE PHONE, YOUR COMPANY NAME WITH ADDRESS AND OTHER MODALITIES WILL BE DISCUSSED AS SOON AS YOU GET BACK TO ME.

YOURS FAITHFULLY,
MICHAEL TAYLOR.

[end spam]

Ah, yes.  I just love it when I'm contacted by the children of former heads of state.  I'm waiting for Amy Carter to ask me to help her rescue the family's peanut crop from the bole weevil.

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Friday, September 14, 2007

My new career

I recently did two things to try to kick-start my career in communications.

First, I contacted the publishers of a new local newspaper to let them know that I would like to be an assignment photographer for them.  It's something I've wanted to do for a long time, but never got around to.  But a few weeks ago I was reading the second issue of a local paper and decided to finally give it a whirl.  I hit their website.  I filled out their "Contact Us" form, giving them my contact info and a link to my Flickr site.  I got a call from the Sports Editor less than a week later.  He liked my photos and put me down as someone they could call to cover community events.  I just spoke with him for the first time on Wednesday.  I lined up a couple of community events taking place this weekend that I thought they might be interested in. 

But, I just got a call from the Sports Editor asking me to cover a specific event tomorrow night.  I am psyched.  I don't know if I will be able to get in.  It is a fund raiser event for a local high school athletics department.  Tickets are $75 a pop.  I'm not paying that admission and neither is the paper.  But the Sports Editor said that he would try to talk to the Athletic Director tonight to let him know that I will be there.  I have that man's name if they try to give me a hard time at the door.  Hopefully, I will get in and get some good shots.  I am a little nervous about this being an indoor event.  I despise shooting with my flash.  Oh well, all I can do is aim, shoot and hope for the best.

Second, I submitted some work to a popular TV review blog site.  I don't know if I have a shot, but I'm hoping that they like my work and ask me to write for them.  I think this one is a long shot, but who knows?

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Brilliant Spammer

Oh, this is brilliant.  An email showed up in my spam folder today that appeared to be incorrectly labeled as spam.  The subject line said, "Are you related to Robert by any chance?"  Actually, yes, I am.  So I opened the message.  Here is the rest of the message.

[begin spam message]

May I have your kind attention.By providential guidance,I am reaching you in of your relative Robert.I say your relative because you both share the same last name.My resolve to contact was based on my belief that most time people who share the same last name have a common ancestral root.However correct me if I was wrong.

[interrupt spam message] The dude totally has my attention here.  Because not only do I have a relative named Robert, he is the genealogist of our family and makes posts all over the 'net tracing our family history. [back to spam message]
 
While I assume you are aware of Robert's demise last year,it is possible that you are not aware of his investent in our bank.This mail,therefore,is to inform you that Robert made two investment  deposits at our bank.

[interrupt spam message] Whoa.  Robert is not dead.  I just saw him last month at my mother's memorial service.  OK, something is up with this message. [back to spam message]
 
It is advised that you take timely step(s) to regularize the investment and save it from risk of depreciation in value or loss.
 
Please reply confidentially.
 
Thank you for your time.
 
I am Melvin HEIKIME

[end spam message]

It wasn't until the end that it fully hit me that this was spam.  Instead of claiming to be the deposed prince of Nigeria, asking for assistance to recover his international funds, this guy wants me to contact him to claim money he's holding from my supposedly dead relative.  Free money.  From a stranger.  Yeah, that's believable.  Though, technically, the guy says that my "relative" Robert, made an investent in his bank, not an investment.  I'm not sure what to expect from an investent.  Also, how do I "reply confidentially" to an email message?  I'm not terribly sure, but my guess is that posting it on my blog is not exactly what he had in mind.

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Thursday, September 13, 2007

big storm coming

I just saw lightning.  YAY!  We haven't had enough good thunder storms this summer.

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Wednesday, September 12, 2007

A link you all should read

This article completely explains me.  It is titled, "Field Guide: Sarcastic Masters."  I think it is funny that in the article they point out that Masters of Sarcasm are typically hiding their own feelings of inadequacy behind their stabbing wit.  All I have to say to that is, "DUH!"  You don't hone a skill like mine if your life was full of people sidling up to you begging to be your friend.  Most sarcastic people acquired their skills as a defense mechanism to either stop getting lost in the background or to stop people from making fun of them.  At least, that's how I came to be this way.  And I disagree that sarcastic people won't admit that they feel inadequate.  I admit it all the time, especially in sarcastic, witty barbs aimed at myself. 

But then again, I got my hand slapped for being a b!tch several years ago.  So, perhaps I am a little more self-aware than most.

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Tuesday, September 11, 2007

Vegas Ain't Cheap No Mo'

I'm going to a software convention in Vegas in October.  The convention is being held at my favorite hotel, The Venetian.  We get a special convention discount on rooms - $250 per night.  Seriously.  That's the discounted price.  I've looked all over and can't find a cheaper price for The Venetian anywhere online.  So, looks like we won't be staying at The Venetian.

I am scheduled to be in Dallas the week prior to the conference.  Since I will already be out there-ish, I thought that I would just fly from Dallas straight to Vegas.  (Our team may get to fly to Dallas on the corporate jet.)  So the decision has to be made about whether I spend the weekend in Dallas or in Vegas.  Now which do you think I'd prefer?  I have never seen the Grand Canyon, so I think I'd like to do that (or something similarly cool in Vegas). 

But dang!  Vegas is outrageously expensive.  I think the company will cover my flights.  But I don't expect them to cover my weekend hotel nights, not all of them at least.  So I'm trying to find a reasonably priced hotel that is clean and not full of smarmy Vegas gamblers.  Do you know how difficult that is?  I think I finally found a place that received a great review from Frommer's and people who've stayed there.  But the website is down as if they are no longer in business.  I can't see photos of the place.  I haven't called the phone number yet, maybe there is just something wrong with their website.  The only thing that makes me hesitate is that this place is in old downtown - the really kitchy part of Vegas.  Right now, I'm just not in the mood for that.  I don't know.  I'm just annoyed that nothing about planning this trip seems to be going my way.

Anyone have any free nights in a 4-star Vegas hotel on the strip that they'd like to gift me?

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Monday, September 10, 2007

An Outrage

I forgot to mention something outrageous that happened at the movies on Saturday.  I was charged $9.50 to see a movie at 4:30 in the afternoon.  I thought the girl had made a mistake and reminded her that it was 4:30.  She replied, "Matinee prices end at 3:00."  That's outrageous! 

I was reminded of a story Gil Gerard told at Dragon*Con.  (He played Buck Rogers in the 1979 TV series of the same name.)  He told us that going to the "picture show" was his favorite thing to do as a kid.  This dude's in his 60's now, so he was a kid in the 50's - Leave it to Beaver era.  He said that he would take the bus to the theater, buy a ticket (that allowed him to see as many movies as they were showing for the whole afternoon), get a coke and some popcorn, and then catch a bus ride home.  The entire afternoon, including bus fare, set him back 25 cents.  One stinking quarter.  And I have to pay $9.50 to see one movie at 4:30 in the afternoon! 

I used to love to go the movie theater.  I love popcorn and the big screen and a darkened room full of people laughing or screaming at the same time.  But there's been a huge debate about that movie theater experience over the last 10 years.  Patrons have turned into idiots - answering their cellphones, bringing kids to non-family movies, talking in non-whispers, etc., etc.  Then there is the actual condition of the theaters.  I don't know if the problem lies in the lack of quality employees or, again, the rude behavior of patrons not cleaning up after themselves, but the cleanliness of most theaters leaves quite a bit to be desired.  I can't stand to have my feet stick to the floor (or at least a floor not mine). 

Fewer and fewer "normal" people go the movies anymore.  Most wait for a movie to either come out on DVD or hit On Demand so they can watch it in the privacy of their own homes.  And with home theaters becoming more sophisticated every day, the "big screen" experience at home is getting closer and closer to the theater experience. 

There are still plenty of movies that I would like to first see at a theater.  But I view this crazy matinee pricing scheme as a big slap in the face. 

Am I the only one?

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Etiquette, a Movie Spoiler, T Wii-ing, and Arrested Development

This post will not be in chronological order, which is soooo against my nature...

On Saturday, I got, er, missed a phone call from a friend.  She and her sister want to throw a surprise party for their third sister at my house.  No problem.  I don't really like surprise parties (you should read that as I HATE SURPRISE PARTIES WITH A PASSION THAT BURNS BRIGHTER THAN 12 MILLION SUNS!), so I feel a little odd about turning a friend into a surprise party victim.  But I'm at least willing to acknowledge that this girl's sisters know her better than I.  She may like surprise parties. 

But the other odd thing is that this is a housewarming party.  That is far more odd for me.  I guess some people have done it this way, but I thought the whole point of a housewarming party was to show off the new house.  How can we do that if the party is at my house?  Simply put, we can't. 

I think I'm terrible at things like etiquette.  But even I understand that basic fact about a housewarming party.  It would never even occur to me to have a housewarming party at a location other than the new house.  If pressed, I guess I can think of two reasons for not having it on location: 1) wanting to have it before the house is ready so the new homeowner can benefit from the gifts she receives and/or 2) wanting to invite more people than the new home can hold.  Both of those are probably valid in this case.  The new homeowner is a single mom buying her first house.  She will probably need all the help she can get decorating her house - that crap can be so expensive.  And while her place has a great plan for a single mother and her young daughter, it won't hold more than about 20 people, maybe a few more if we all really like each other.  The family this girl belongs to is really popular, so I can imagine them wanting to invite at least twice that number, if not triple.

Anyhoo, I shared my thoughts with one of the sisters.  She's going to talk it over with her other sister and get back to me.  If they still don't want to have the party at the new house, I will let them use my place.  I just hope they wait a couple of weeks and have it at the new house. 

So, T came over on Saturday afternoon.  We ate lunch and then went to a movie.  We saw "Becoming Jane."  I don't want to spoil the ending for you, but come on, don't most of you know how Jane Austen lived her life?  Not only am I very familiar with the details of Jane's life, I'd also seen the movie before.  I found it quite hysterical when T got upset/annoyed about a particular plot twist.  She said to me, "I'm gonna be so mad at you if this turns out [spoiler deleted]."  See, this was even funnier coming from T because she and I have each read the Stephanie Barron novels about Jane Austen.  These novels are fictional accounts of mysteries that happened in Jane Austen's life - very much along the lines of "Murder, She Wrote" with Jane Austen playing the role of Jessica Fletcher.  However, Stephanie Barron has done enough homework to place the books in locations where Jane is known to have been and to include characters from her life that really existed (like various family members).  The stories are littered with footnotes that address real facts (such and such character from such and such novel was loosely based on this person who Jane knew in real life).  So I recognized the cottage where they lived and was waiting on a significant plot point to happen long before it ever did.  But T went in to this movie without thinking about any of that stuff.  Perhaps she was thinking more about watching a Jane Austen story than the story of Jane Austen.  She was completely surprised when it turned out the way that it did.  Well, I thought her reaction was funny, anyway.

After we got back to my place, T wanted to exercise.  I just looked at her like she had three heads.  Eventually, a thought struck me - my Wii is fun and gives you a little bit of exercise.  So we played Wii for an hour.  YAY!  I finally found someone that I can beat in Wii Tennis.  And that "give her a break, it was her first time" excuse ain't gonna work.  She beat me at Wii Bowling.  It was my worst game of Wii Bowling in, like, ever.  She left in time to get to bed at a reasonable hour for her meeting the next morning.

Finally, we get to Arrested Development.  I never watched this show when it was in production.  I don't know why.  The Doctor told me that it was really funny, but I never took the time to figure out when it was on.  I think I've learned my lesson.  The only two shows that The Doctor has recommended to me as "funny" are stinking hi-larious (King of the Hill and Arrested Development).  A few months ago, I figured out that G4 (a video game channel) was playing re-runs of AD.  I set up my DVR to record all shows.  I fell in love with the show, even though I had a hard time figuring out what was going on.  The plots are so outrageous that if you haven't seen previous shows, you can easily get lost.  That didn't matter to me.  I knew what I was watching was completely unique and worth struggling through.

I finally broke down and bought the entire series on DVD a couple of weeks ago (two and a half seasons).  I finished season one last week and had moved on to season two.  Poly and I Dunno came over on Friday night to watch a movie.  I promised I Dunno that we would watch Serenity, a sci-fi movie with lots of action and creepiness and some funny, funny lines.  Poly saw my AD DVDs and asked about that show.  I literally couldn't talk about it without giggling hysterically.  Each time I thought of a new scene to describe to him, I giggled through the explanation.  Poly thought it sounded funny enough that he wanted to watch it.  I didn't want to let I Dunno down.  I just didn't think he would get most of the humor in AD. 

So, I sent Poly home with the first season DVD set.  Less than 24 hours later, I got a txt message from Poly stating, "Arrested Development is like cocaine.  I'm almost done with the second disc."  There are at least 6 episodes on each disc.  He'd seen almost 12 episodes.  This is from a guy who rarely watches TV because he is so busy.  I'm so happy when I can introduce someone to my latest TV addiction.  I'm always forming new addictions - welcome to my world.  Now I just have to introduce him to the glory that is the DVD commentary.  I live for Special Features.

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Tuesday, September 04, 2007

Dragon*Con and headaches

I had a good time at Dragon*Con.  But there are things I would like to have changed.  You see, Dragon*Con is all about choices - making the right ones.  There are plenty of people who go to interact with each other and dress up and buy stuff and just revel in the Sci-Fi/Fantasy/Comic/Gaming world.  That's not me.  I go to get a peek behind the scenes at how TV and movies are made.  I don't dress up.  I don't march in the parade.  I don't go to "parties."  I will chat with whoever is around me in the various lines I'm waiting in, but I'm not there to make lasting connections. 

So, this is how Dragon*Con works.  There are three hotels that all occupy the same block on three different streets in downtown.  You can walk from one hotel to the next and to the next simply by crossing two streets.  The ballrooms/meeting rooms are set aside for various uses.  There are various "tracks" or themes of "programming" that provide panels.  Panels are discussions on a specific topic.  An obvious theme at a Sci-Fi convention is Star Trek.  The "Trek Trak" plans out it's panels according to what guests it can convince to attend.  If they can get people associated with Trek to attend, they will set up Q&A panels with these guests.  These guests could be anyone from people who have written Star Trek books (these panels would be in small rooms) to actors who had one or two guest starring roles (like the actor who played Q) to series regulars (like the actors who played "Lt. Uhura", "Commander Riker", "Dr. Crusher" and "Data").  It would be an unbelievable achievement to get someone as big as Shatner, Nimoy, or Patrick Stewart.

Unlike other conventions, actors don't get paid to appear at Dragon*Con.  They don't have to pay for their hotel or meals.  But they can only make money by selling their autographs and photo-ops.  So, there is one big room called "The Walk of Fame" where all the famous guests sit while they aren't in panels.  Attendees cruise through the room looking for people they recognize.  When they spot a guest they like, they walk up to their table (or get in line to do so) and pay whatever price the guest thinks their autograph is worth.  Depending on the star and how jaded they are, you can spend a couple of minutes chatting with them and/or taking photos.  Most are cool enough to let you take photos.  After all, you just gave them money to sign their name on a DVD cover (which also put money into their pocket when you purchased the DVD).  No need to bite the hand that feeds you (or as one actress put it, keeps you in Prada).

I always feel so sorry for the actors who sit there with no one to talk to.  They wait and wait with a serene look on their face, hoping someone will want their autograph.  The one actor that made me the most sad this year was a guy that I actually like.  I don't know his name, but I've liked him in everything I've seen him in.  He played the professor in Real Genius who was seemed cool but was really selling his students' class project to the government to be a high powered laser weapon.  (Not to ruin the plot, but the students end up turning his house into a ginormous Jiffy-Pop.)  This man was seated right near the front of the room.  You couldn't walk into the place without seeing him.  But I never saw a line in front of him.  In fact, I don't know that I ever saw anyone talking to him.  I didn't get an autograph, but I did take 10 seconds to tell him that Real Genius is one of my favorite movies.  He smiled and thanked me.  I don't know if it is considered more rude to just walk by or to stop and not buy an autograph.  I hope he appreciated someone knowing who he was, even if I didn't give him any money.

Back to the panels.  Typically, actors will be assigned to do at least one Q&A panel per day.  This is where being a character actor can come in handy (if you like doing panels).  People who have guest starred on multiple series can find their way onto two panels per day.  But then, that cuts down on the amount of time they spend selling their autograph.  The Q&A panels can be a lot of fun depending on who appears in them.

The first time I went to Dragon*Con (this was my second time), the panels I attended were awesome.  The actors were funny and incredible entertainers.  They really knew how to work a crowd.  They told great stories about what it was like to film the show.  They'd brought props with them to distribute to some of the fans (the ones who asked questions).  They showed up on time and were completely professional. 

This time, the lines to get in to panels were REALLY long.  If you didn't get in line an hour ahead of time, you risked not getting in or at least being sat in the WAY back (not good for a photographer).  I had come to see the guests from Star Trek and Stargate.  But those two panels were scheduled back to back every day.  I had to choose one or the other.  For various reasons, I opted for Stargate.  I should have chosen Trek at least once.  At least two of the SG people seemed drunk during the panels.  A few others looked hung over, but kinda tried to be professional once they were at the panel.  Unfortunately, it was the drunk and hung over actors who were the big stars - the ones everyone wanted to ask questions of.  These panels were also really large, with 10 actors participating.  That was just too many.  Too often, the answers turned into opportunities to just riff on each other, leaving the audience nothing to do but sit and watch.  As if it weren't bad enough for us to observe that the actors were drunk or hung over, many of the stories they told were about how one guy was drunk or hung over on the set on a regular basis.  Other stories were about farting during scenes or practical jokes that involved fake poop.  Thankfully, there were a couple of actors present who gave good/interesting answers.  Eventually, someone reminded the actors that kids were in the audience and they straightened up a little bit.

I did attend a Trek panel on the last day.  But by then, many of the actors had left.  So I only got to see the guy who played Q.  He is really smart and takes himself a little too seriously.  While he appears to like to do this kind of thing (why else would he still be there), he doesn't do well with "silly" questions.  When people asked him questions like, "What practical jokes have been played on you while filming on any project?"  He answered with, "I don't remember those kinds of things."  That made him seem a little stiff and formal.  But then he had a great story about how he attended Kent State and witnessed the infamous shooting.  He and a friend went to D.C. and made it all the way inside the White House to tell what really happened.  So, sometimes, those serious stories were fascinating. 

This was also the case when I got to see the lady who'd played "Lt. Uhura" on the original Trek, Nichelle Nichols.  She was awesome.  She sings a little bit and tells great stories.  She was a little less formal than Q, but certainly not silly (and definitely not hung over or drunk).  She told an awesome story about Martin Luther King.  It was a really big deal that she, a black woman, was cast as the 4th in command on a show that aired in the 1960's.  (She and Shatner shared the first inter-racial kiss ever aired on TV.)  After the first season, she wanted to quit TV and go back to musical theater.  When she told the creator of the show that she was quitting, he said, "Don't you see what I'm trying to do?"  The very next night, she was at a fund raiser for the NAACP.  MLK approached her to tell her how much he and his family enjoyed the show.  He told her that she was a great role model for his daughter.  She explained that she had just quit.  MLK looked shocked and said, "You can't quit.  Don't you see what that man is trying to do?"  It really made an impact on her that two men she respected used the same phrase within a 24 hour period.  She thought it over and decided to stay on for the life of the show (two more seasons).   To this day, it is widely acknowledge that Trek was instrumental in breaking all kinds of barriers on TV.

So, I missed the panels with the Trek actors that I really wanted to see (though I did get an autograph from one the guy who played Riker).  But maybe they will be back one day.  I sat through a couple of other panels for shows that I don't watch.  It seems like an odd thing to do, but they were still interesting.  Again, these people know how to entertain.  In hindsight, the SG guests were probably the worst panelists at the whole convention.  I will know better next time.  But I still have lots of photos of them posted on my Flickr account.

While at D*C, I had my backpack on and my camera around my neck and I walked and walked and climbed stairs and walked some more.  I didn't get a whole lot of sleep any of the days.  So by Monday, I was absolutely beat and I had an horrific headache.  I went home and took all the pills in my possession to try to get rid of it.  I laid in bed and watched some TV.  I finally fell asleep around 9:00, with my headache still in tact.  I woke up around 3:00, still suffering.  I took more pills.  By the time I needed to get up, my headache had been with me for around 18 hours.  At that point, I knew there was only one OTC medication that would knock it out, but I didn't have any.  I was late to work because I had to wait for Walgreens to open to get some Aleve Cold & Sinus.  A little over an hour later, my headache was finally gone.  But I am completely wiped out.  I feel like I could pass out at any moment.

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